Double Black

shopping bag holder

A/N: Sequel to ribbon dispenser !!

Like most things did, this started out as a bet between the duo as well.

Since both of them were working from home, they had way more free time than required. Because Dazai was the worst employee to ever exist in the history of bad employees, practically all his time was 'free time'. Sure, he had Zoom meetings with the Agency and stuff, but why pay attention to those when he could just annoy his partner, right?

On the other hand, Chuuya was actually a good example. As an Executive, he had to set a decent example for the lower ranked Mafia members, at the very least. Even without the Executive title, he's always been a hard worker, insisting on doing his job first. Everything else could wait.

Well, his diligence and work persona could be seriously questioned after what went down a week ago. Not only had Chuuya zoned out during a very important meeting about four times, but he had also ended up revealing to his colleagues that he was married. The mafioso had actually called over his husband and used said husband's bandages as ribbons to tie up his hair. Certainly a very good example on his co-workers.

Fortunately, the only ones in the meeting were people he's known for years. At least the newer employees didn't have to experience the serious trauma that was watching their powerful Executive be soft and domestic with just is husband. The Port Mafia has clearly experienced it's fair share of trauma from when the duo worked in the Mafia together.

Apparently, it was now the Armed Detective Agency's turn to get their own dose of trauma and regrets.

The bet happened on a night when Chuuya was making pizza at home. His partner complained a bunch about how the pandemic was so stupid and that not allowing restaurants to make deliveries to their homes should truly be illegal. He didn't ask for things much, but he had been in the mood for pizza that day, okay! Food delivery services were temporarily ceased due to the pandemic; hence, the only option was for Chuuya to make pizza at home.

Somewhere between their aimless conversations, they stumbled upon the topic of impressions. Dazai insisted that he could do a perfect Chuuya impression, and then proceeded to actually prove his word. Well, it wasn't like pretending to be Chuuya was difficult or anything. He just had to shriek a little and lash out profanities while talking about wine and hats. Chuuya punched him for such a stereotypical impression, but he looked cute doing it, so it was okay.

Other than that, Dazai also insisted that Chuuya could never do a flawless Dazai impression even if he tried his best. In his words, "There's no way an angry, chibi slug like you can ever measure up to my bright personality!"

To that, his partner scoffed some and threatened to take away his pizza privileges, "Stop calling me short, asshole. Besides, I can definitely do a perfect impression of you. I've done it before."

Dazai raised his eyebrows as he carefully slid over his pizza away from the angry redhead's reach, "Oh, is that so? Say Chuuya! How about you answer all my work calls tomorrow? I haven't done any work in a while, so I'm sure there'll be lots of calls to answer tomorrow. You can pretend to be me then, and we'll see how many of them will actually buy it."

Chuuya muttered, "Don't be an idiot. I have work tomorrow and-"

The detective cut him off, "You have the day off tomorrow. It's decided then, Chuuya~!"

With that, he finished his pizza and put away the dishes before skipping back to their bedroom. Chuuya screamed curses at him, but not for too long. This whole thing was just an excuse for Dazai to make Chuuya do all his work once again. It was almost like they were in the Mafia again. Back then, they could easily forge each other's signatures. Apparently, they were taking it a few steps further seven years later, by pretending to be the other person completely.