You left me no choice / Druig x reader

Chapter 10 | win

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I searched all over the Domo for nearly half an hour and I still couldn't find her. My guess was that I walked right past her a long time ago but with her being invisible, I obviously didn't see her.

Coming up into the hall of bedrooms for the 5th time, I huffed in discouragement as I guided myself to my room, in need of a rest before returning to the group.

Sliding my door close behind myself, I noticed how Makkari hadn't touched a hair in the room.
Everything was left exactly where I remembered it, not that I had a lot of things in the first place. In fact, I was probably the Eternal with the least personal things out of everyone. However sad that was to admit.

Dropping on the soft mattress, I laid flat on my back and interlocked my fingers over my stomach as I closed my eyes in peace, wishing I could pour myself a warm bath right now.

My mind ventured back to the attack in the Amazon 2 days ago and I couldn't help but think about the portal I opened. I had no control over it, there was nothing I could do to close it and in fact, it felt like I hadn't even conjured it in the first place.
I was so afraid of myself in that moment, I'd never been so traumatized. Out of some miracle, I managed to direct my attention somewhere else, something I hadn't done the first time I conjured a portal of that type.
It must have been the instinct to protect someone from getting hurt by a mess I caused. If Druig hadn't been there, the expression of terror he wore, the pleads he cried out, I don't think I would have had the thriving impulse to shield us from danger.

Ajax was right, I'm a beacon for the Deviants. I'm their source of energy, their source of strength.
Running away was the wisest thing I could have done, no matter what Druig says or does to make me regret ever considering Ajax's offer. He was cruel that way.

My thoughts flourished, linking subjects together like this one, making assumptions and conclusions along the way.
Long minutes passed with only my mind to distract me from the silence until a light knock on the door forced my eyelids open.

"Come in." I sat up straight on my bed as I watched the door slide open, revealing Makkari's sweet smile.

"Can I have a word?" She signed, never dropping her smile. My heart warmed in her presence as I smiled back and waved her inside.
The door remained open, exposing us to the empty hallway
but I didn't mind for that specific reason.

She sat on the edge of the bed with a knee bent under herself and her hands in her lap, never breaking eye contact with me.

"How are you feeling?" She asked as she tilted her head to the side, a gentle smile painted on her face.

"Tired I suppose." I answered as I took in a deep breath.

"That's not what I mean..." she signed before pausing, almost out of hesitation as I frowned at her.

"What do you mean?" I signed back and lazily let my hands fall in my lap.

"How do you feel about Druig?" That was the boldest question Makkari had ever asked me which caught me off guard. I tried not to let it show but nevertheless my mouth fell open. She tilted her head to the side to let me know that I had her full attention as I snapped myself back to reality and directed my eyes down to the floor instead of her.

"What happened between you two after I left?" I asked instead of answering her question. I needed more information before I could answer it. Mostly because I didn't really know where my feelings for Druig lined up right now. All I knew is that I had to make up for what I did to him.

"Nothing!" She signed clearly.

"But he admires you, I know he does. It shows in everything he does around you." I protested as she observed me closely.
"I don't know what to do.
I want to make up for what I did to him, for what I did to you all, but how?!" I stopped signing at this point and just let Makkari read my lips.