NIGHT CHANGES

16. Old habits

Myra Sehgal

We had lot of fun today! I had missed Ishi and Ads a lot! We were busy in our own world, Ishi looking after 'Ishq', Ads on the tour with cricketers and me with my patients and my life. After a lot of days we did this shopping spree.

I had flown from Bangalore to Mumbai for this and to even attend a conference here. Luckily in the same week Ads had an off. I'm thankful to whoever had given an off to Ads.

Hey guys! I'm Myra Sehgal and I don't think I have to introduce myself more. It's already done by my bestie, Ads!
And ofcourse my love, Ishan Kishan. My Shaan❤️

As you know, we have a past. And I'm not hiding the fact that I still love him, from you people.

Today I didn't know that he was also tagging along with us. I spent a good day with him too after soo long. I thoroughly enjoyed his company, which I didn't and won't tell him.

I had missed his goofiness, charming smile, funny comments, flirtings and everything.

From what I had heard from Ads about him, I gathered this much that he had become more flirtatious but not with me, with others. I felt a pang of jealousy when I had heard it.

I felt bad that he had changed! But who am I kidding?
Even I changed a lot! And my change was a drastic one! I have become a serious, responsible and mature person from a carefree, fun and playful person.
Heck! I even have changed my dressing style and everything!
Me who used to experiment with different haircuts and hairstyles have same straight waist length hair from years.

But coming here and seeing him, I don't think he has changed much. He is still his goofy flirty self but in these years he was like that with others not me.

But today he was with me like old times. It was as if we hadn't even got separated. But I was avoiding him.

I don't want to go through the heartbreak again. Years back I somehow mended myself. I had to for my parents, for my friends and for my life. I just couldn't see my parents and friends sad because of me.
Ishi and Ads still blame themselves because they were busy and hadn't given me enough time. But I don't agree with them.

Them traveling to Mumbai and Bangalore back and forth and even attend college, with all these they did give enough time to me and their families.
It's me who didn't tell anything to them, I didn't want to tell them anything about him being a cricketer or anything else about him before they meet. But unfortunately or say fortunately they didn't meet. If they knew it was Ishan who broke my heart they wouldn't have kept quite. Let's just say that they would be in jail, and the cricket world would have lost Ishan.

So I hadn't told them, before they could meet itself we had separated.
What to do? Fate.

I hadn't expected Ishan to just bail on me that night. I couldn't believe he could do like that. I had trusted him a lot and that day, he broke it.

Initially I was hating him. I couldn't tell anything to Ads and Ishi when they were asking what happened, because his memories were hurting me.
But I did open up to them, not completely just the gist, after that I did feel a bit light.

I got time to think of his point of view when my anger and hate subsided a bit. I don't know his reasons, I had blocked his number the next day and lost my phone after few months so couldn't even read his messages. I bet he would have told it there, but I couldn't. I still had his number by heart and could have called him. But my mind didn't let me.

But today, seeing him I felt a different kind of peace after 2 years. It was really a good time to spend with him. But I have to get back to reality. Day after tomorrow I'll be leaving for Bangalore where I have my own small world, me - my work - my parents - my life. Tomorrow we are just planning to chill at the hotel Ads is staying. Don't know till when we will be stuck with work and meet freely so we decided to stay in to talk, talk and talk.
We have a lot to catch up.