Vampire Heart

Chapter 17

Once I knew myself utterly alone, I closed my eyes and took a deep steadying breath. What I was about to do was bound to provoke me great pain, which I had fought hard to keep away for a long time. But if my suspicions were correct and there was still a chance the mirror pieces were…active, it was my duty to ensure they would not harm anyone ever again. Thus I whispered the names:
‘Rolf. Kai. Hannes. Agnar.’
They were my younger brothers.
And then the sorceress—
‘Kendra.’
She was my betrothed at first, but after one year she chose my brother Rolf instead. I did not suffer long, my ego was not as sharp as my brother’s. But somehow, Rolf never quite overcame the fact that he had been her second choice.
Kendra was beautiful and very powerful, a redoubtable witch from a very young age. In a time when Christianity had already prevailed, Kendra was practicing the old ways of the Vikings, our ancestors who still worshiped Odin the Father. She would strike dangerous bargains with anyone who offered her money and influence, even though she had inserted herself into the royal family anyway.
This had been one amongst our many differences: I obeyed and lived by the rules. She was a rebel, bold and brave, a far better fit to Rolf’s wayward nature. In that sense, I was relieved we had parted. And, for a time, it seemed things had finally settled for the best.
Then, one calamity followed the next. Father sent me to Rome to secure the Pope’s blessing so I was not at home. Strange how all the drama in my existence tended to happen in my absence. When I returned, I learned that Father had died of a mysterious and sudden illness and that Mother had taken her own life soon after. A mere month later, I was crowned King of Norway because I was first-born and because my father had wanted me to.
I was heartbroken, but I gathered my courage and wits to do what had to be done. The Kingdom needed a ruler and the earldomen had named me unanimously. Everyone had cheered, all but my four brothers. They stood in the shadows, watching me ascend to the throne, and there were lightning bolts flashing from their eyes.
Kendra had already joined with Rolf and stood by his side as his wife. In her eyes I saw not hatred, but envy. For a moment, I wanted her back. For the smallest instant, I found myself regretting not having her as my Queen. Soon, I would come to regret that very shadow of regret.
My sister-in-law took advantage of my grief and twisted my senses. In the middle of the night, she lured me to her chamber and pulled me into a heated embrace, whispering words of passion, bewitching me with every kiss. Through a red haze, I saw the mirror and its encrusted runes swirling and snivelling. The smooth watery surface began to shimmer and tremble. The reflection was sucked into a black whirlpool, from which four demons with long white fangs and red eyes emerged.
Kendra ran away and locked me inside the room. Before the door closed, I caught a glimpse of Rolf and Hannes waiting for her in the corridor. I sprang to them, but they bolted the door from the outside and left me weaponless.
I began fighting the demons with my bare hands. They threw me from one to the other, playing with me as if I was their toy. They sank their teeth into my flesh and fed me their blood. And so it went for the entire night.
It must have been high noon the following day and we were still fighting. Strangely, a sort of companionship had emerged. Two demons would stand aside while the other two fought me. But they kept feeding me blood and thus I remained alive. After who knew how many hours, we were all lying on the floor, spent.
I saw them sniggering, getting ready to come at me again and feed on me. While I lay bleeding on the cold floor, my fingers felt something sharp under Kendra's bed. My fist closed around a pair of sewing scissors. When the first demon attacked, I stabbed him with the tool, stabbed him again and again with as much strenght and hatred I could muster. He fell to the floor, his dark body becoming ash instantly.
One victory was all I needed. As the other three threw themselves over me, I stabbed left and right, sprang, twisted and swirved with an agility I never knew I could be capable of.
Two more demons turned to ashes and desintegrated before my eyes. The last one held up his hand.
"I am Magnus," he croaked. "Before you send me back, know that you are now one of us. Our blood will change you. Slay me and your strength will grow tenfold."
"Who sent you?" I cried. "What would you have with me?"
"Kendra the Witch summoned us from Loki's Pit. But when you next thirst for vengeance, seek it from your brothers. She is but their tool."
I stood aghast.
"My brothers? They did this?"
Mangus cackled and wrenched me close to him, gripping my hand that was still clutching the scissors.
"End this now and you may have your revenge."
"I--I don't wish to join you in the Pit."
"It is endless and...mostly entertaining."
"N-no--I don't want it--"
"Then drink my blood until there is none left."
I stared into his red eyes.
"Why?"
"I wish to rest is all. Now do it."
And so I did. I stabbed him in the chest and drank straight from the heart until I felt his body grow still and lifeless. I do not know if by obeying Magnus I did him a kindness. I for one was eternally damned at seven-and-twenty years of age.
After it was over, Magnus too became a dried pile of ashes, while I fell into a deep sleep. My transformation had started and my body froze and perfected.
It lasted until the following sundown. I woke up paifully parched and with my senses in high alert. The door to Kendra's room was still locked, so I realised they must have been too scared to see if I was still alive. The cowards.
I grabbed the latch and it broke to crumbs in my fist. I stared at it in surprise. So this was the power of the devils of Loki, if they were ever that. Curious, I turned to Kendra’s mirror. The runes still swirled slowly, as if sealing their enchantment. Then I glanced at myself, my new self. I was paler than ever before, my dark hair in stark contrast with my white skin. My eyes were blood-red, filled with blood. My lips appeared purple and thin, pointy sharp fangs visible behind them. The new self, the new me, the monster they had created.
At first, I wanted to cower in a corner and cry, but the overcoming need for revenge was greater. I stormed out of the chamber and tore down everything in my path. My first victims were unfortunate servants whom I met in the corridors. The thirst was such, I did not for a moment stop to think what I was doing. I only knew I needed to drink human blood and drink it from the vein. My entire universe was reduced to blood and death. Painful death.
My brothers, I found feasting in the great hall, undoubtedly celebrating my demise. Their wives were there too, joined by a few treacherous earls who had already sensed the wind of change blowing in Rolf’s favour. Everyone fell silent when they saw me. I must have been quite a sight to behold, covered in blood from head to toes, knife-sharp teeth, claw-like hands.
“Damian—“
My youngest brother Agnar’s whisper stirred something within me, but I was too far gone to care. His betrayal hurt the most.
After a few moments of shocking silence, screams erupted. The men sprang after their weapons, pushing the women behind to shield them. In the ensuing chaos of overturned tables and spilt food and ale, I strode like a predator after the culprits.
“Damian, brother, don’t do this—”
Instinctually, I launched myself in the air and nailed Rolf by the neck to the nearest wall.
“Rolf, brother, you have done this.”
With one turn of my wrist, Rolf’s neck snapped and tore off, his head landing with a thud at my feet. Instantly, the chaos became greater. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Kendra’s long, golden-red hair shining like flames through the doorway and out into the night. I sprinted after her, but the guards had been alerted and the hall was full of swarming people. Swords and spears were being plunged into my flesh, blood spraying out. Yet through the pain, I moved as fast and alive as ever.
My other three brothers were trying to guide the people out, but I continued to tear and mangle my way through bodies to the door. I shut it with an echoing noise, trapping us all inside.
Kai lifted his hands and tried to reason with the beast in his own turn.
“Damian, please. You are King. Let us calm down and discuss this.”
Hannes joined him, both of them drawing out their swords. I sniggered, showing them my fangs. Behind my brothers, a wall of guards was gathering slowly, everyone pointing their weapons at me. They were wavering, I could see. I had not been king for long, but I was still their King.
“The time for discussion is gone, Kai,” I growled, my eyes hunting for my last brother. “Who was it? Which of you killed our parents?”
Agnar stepped forward then, facing me, standing nearest.
“Father was poisoned,” he spoke softly, his blue-green eyes searching mine. “But not by our hands. And Mother killed herself afterwards out of grief.”
“Who, then?”
My remaining brothers glanced at one another and then back at me.
“It was Kendra, your former betrothed,” Hannes voiced loudly.
I grinned, not believing one word. I had expected as much.
“Why would Kendra kill the King?” I drawled.
Hannes shrugged, trying for bravery.
“Who knows. Jealousy? You can’t trust a witch—they’re all mad, aren’t they?”
“How unfortunate for you that I am equally mad,” I hissed. “And in my madness, I am certain that Father’s poisoning occurred at your word.”
I launched myself at them, ignoring the swords and arrows.
“It was Rolf—Rolf made Kendra do it—” Kai tried too late.
I killed him and Hannes one after another and took their blood into me. Agnar managed to sneak around to the door to unlock it, he too disappearing into the night. With a raging cry, I bolted after him.
Years before, he and I had been closest, but ever since Father had determined I would succeed him, the other three had managed to turn Agnar against me somehow.
I glimpsed his white-blond hair billowing in the wind on the fjords. He had boarded a ship, but of course, I was faster than a hundred of Odin’s oarsmen and caught up with him on open sea.
We fell into the icy waters together. We fought each other as only sworn enemies could. I had the advantage of not needing air to breathe, while Agnar was soon drowning. I pushed him downwards to the sea floor and struck his head against the sharp-edges of the rocks. Blood floated out in long ribbons and his limbs became still.
I swam up to the surface and back to Trondheim. The entire capital had been made aware of what had happened and the mass-murders done by the King himself. I was still full of anger and took my revenge on the remaining earls and their families. Then, I sat on the throne, a mad King in all the senses of the word.
Of course, in that state, I was not fit to rule for long. I had no interest in it and the country suffered. But I had been a caring person in my human life and soon, that quality returned tenfold. My thirst for blood waned and my guilt plagued me worse than death. I summoned the loyal noblemen and chose to abdicate with what remained intact of my honour.
The new King Olaf was wise and good. I knew he would be the only one brave enough to pick up the pieces of the broken Kingdom and make it whole again.  The land would soon blossom under his rule. The horrors I committed were eventually forgotten.
I left Norway. I never once bothered to look for Kendra. Too ashamed of myself, I ran away to the other side of the world, where the Holy Wars raged endlessly on the banks of the Euphrates.
So that was the story of how I became what I was. Of course, there was far more to it, but the memory had brought what interested me the most. Kendra's mirror was Alzbeta's mirror. It was the root to all evil.
Now more than ever, I was convinced that even the smallest remaining fragment would still be imbibed with magic. If Jan Turek had been foolish enough not to get rid of all the pieces, the castle and all those who lived in it were in danger.
I had to see him.
‘I have to see him.’
I said the words aloud, just as Alzbeta was stepping over the threshold, freshly flushed and fed.
‘See who?’
She seated herself beside me on the armrest, her eyes aglow with curiosity. I could instantly feel her light-heartedness, how her appearance and her mood had both benefitted from the intake of new blood. It was only natural, she was a newborn.
‘Are we meeting someone new and exciting?’ she battered her eyelashes and gave me a hopeful smile.
I scoffed and stood up wearily.
‘Alas, no, you aren’t meeting him. Only I shall go.’
I stared directly at her, opening my mind for her. Alzbeta’s features became stern and apprehensive.
‘Why him?’
‘Because he is the Lord Protector now.’
‘Why not her directly? Why can’t you go to Irena and tell her? She is Queen, isn’t she? Why not—’
‘You know very well why!’ I snapped. ‘If I see her again—I won’t be able to leave. I’m not that strong, Alzbeta.’
She stood up determinedly.
‘Well, then, I’ll go to her. I’ll speak to her about the mirror pieces, tell her to make sure every one of them is destroyed.’
‘No, you can’t go either. The bird warned me. There is a price upon your head, the danger is too great.’
She laughed.
‘I’m not scared of a few guards—’
‘Those guards—those men—have all lost friends and family at your hands, Alzbeta. Believe me. If you are seen, they will rip you apart limb from limb before your teeth have had any time for damage.’
She shrugged unimpressed, but her zeal was greatly subdued.
‘We’ll think this through,’ she said quietly. ‘There is no need to rush. If there were large mirror pieces left anywhere in the castle, I would have known it. I say we wait. They’ll relent their vigilance soon and we will seize our opportunity.’
I nodded slowly.
‘I only hope you’re right.’
‘I am. You’ll see.’
She came to stand before me, her hand cupping my cheek affectionately.
‘You worry too much, Damian. And…you are too pale and gaunt for my liking. You must feed.’
I shook my head. Blood was furthest from my mind.
‘Yes. You’ve had nothing since the innkeeper—which you had to share anyway.’
Alzbeta pulled me gently to the window, gesturing towards the dark woods below.
‘I saw bear tracks in there,’ she murmured. ‘Come.’
Unwillingly, I followed her.
Two weeks passed in a blur. We hunted and fed a lot at Alzbeta’s insistence that I had lost too much stamina and had neglected myself. In that sense, I knew she was right, so I did my best to at least enjoy the hunting parties. If anything, she and I contributed to the lessening of wolf and bear population in the entire Bezdez region, which would be a relief for the sheep and goat shepherds that year.
Yet, despite the fresh blood, my anxiety was spiking. I was constantly worrying, constantly doubting my decision of staying away. Irena and I shared a deep connection, nurtured both by blood and by our feelings for each other. Of course I knew my fears were directly linked to hers, I was an empath after all. But I had come so close to ruining everything that night. Could I go there again and not see her?
As it would soon be proven, I could. I made a habit of sneaking around the castle at night, walking the corridors, a ghost that creeped and wailed of his lost love. I felt her at every step. I could hear her breath, her heartbeat; I knew it when she was awake or asleep. If she walked down the hallways, I ran in the opposite direction. Mostly, I haunted the attic because its narrow windows were closer to her balcony. Also, it was filled with ancient pieces of furniture, an ideal place to hide leftovers from a broken enchanted mirror. So I searched and searched.
Through all this, I did not allow myself to lay eyes on her. I felt her, heard her, almost tasted her perfume lingering in her wake. But I avoided seeing her at all cost. It was a test, obviously. I was testing myself, perversely wanting to know how long I would last in this manner, how more I could take before I broke.
‘You are playing with fire, Damian,’ Alzbeta muttered disapprovingly one morning. ‘You said it was dangerous for me, but I don’t think you are safe either.’
‘Oh, I’m perfectly safe from the men,’ I sighed. ‘It’s her I’m really afraid of.’
‘Why do you keep going? You’ve found no traces of the mirror anyway. Why do you keep torturing yourself thus?’
There it was. The real question. Why I kept doing it. I raked my hands through my hair and heaved a staggering breath.
‘There is news...of Irena’s marriage.’
‘What marriage? I thought it was decided she was free to wait.’
‘Apparently not anymore. There is a clause in the Habsburg Treaty. She must marry before the year’s end, or a husband will be chosen for her—from the Austrian nobility.’
Alzbeta frowned.
‘I don’t recall anything of the sort. Jaromir never mentioned it.’
‘Most likely it was a Council’s decision. A marriage-strengthened alliance with the Empire would only help Bohemia.’
‘Jaromir must have given his consent. The Council wouldn’t just decide so arbitrarily.’
‘Jaromir thought she would be marrying Turek within a year, perhaps even sooner. I was out of the game anyway, so there was no hindrance.’
Alzbeta came to me and took my hand in hers.
‘Stop this, Damian, I beg you. This…what you are doing? This is madness. You are dooming yourself.’
I scoffed, roaming my eyes on the empty walls.
‘I’ve been doomed for the last three hundred years, Alzbeta.’
‘Then stop it! Please! Just put a stop to it and you and I may leave Bohemia.’
I gazed long and deep into her silver eyes, red veins of imploration were gathering there.
‘I cannot,’ I breathed. ‘I cannot leave her.’
Alzbeta’s nails were digging into my palm.
‘She is no longer your concern. You have done your duty. She is now Queen. She has her Council and her loyal subjects.’
‘There may still be traces of the mirror—’
‘You said you’ve searched everywhere.’
‘Not her chamber. Nor Turek’s.’
‘Irena wouldn’t keep any. She’s well aware of its power.’
‘Turek would.’
Alzbeta frowned and shook her head.
‘I don’t think so.’
‘Then you didn't know him. He is vindictive. He would keep the tiniest sliver of glass just to own a weapon against you.’
‘He loved me.’
‘Yes and you practically tortured the love out of him in the worst possible way.’
Alzbeta glared at me, then turned on the spot and strode to the window.
‘I loved him too. For a time.’
‘How exactly did you love him, Alzbeta?’
She flustered and squirmed uncomfortably on the spot.
‘As I have loved any man, as I loved Jaromir, for instance. But no, I will not be so conceited to say that I loved Jan as I have loved you.’
I looked down, having expected as much.
‘Perhaps. Although it is my belief that you have never truly loved, Alzbeta.’
She blinked in surprise.
‘Oh, I see. I have never loved anyone because I cannot? Because I love myself more than I could ever love another person, is that it?’
‘No, simply because you were never taught either. Had you loved yourself, you wouldn’t have asked me to turn you. Had you loved me…you wouldn’t have hurt Irena—and so on.’
I was hurting her now and I knew it. Alzbeta’s eyes filled up with blood tears instantly.
‘Why do you say these things to me?’ she breathed, her voice faltering.
‘So that you may understand why I cannot leave,' I sighed.
I walked to her and cupped her cheeks, wiping off the tears of guilt I had caused.
‘Tell me, Beta,’ I said softly. ‘If Turek had a piece of your mirror, what were the chances he became dominated by it, as you also were?’
She bit her lip, frowning.
‘Even if he does have a piece of it, the thing should be big enough for him to see himself in it. If it’s only a little shard, it cannot cause much harm.’
‘Much?’
‘It may change him, affect his moods, make him ill, but ultimately, he lacks the magic to amplify those effects.’
‘Still, we don’t know what it can really do. What if he becomes so ill he starts hurting people?’
Alzbeta glanced out of the window at the pattering rain.
‘There is that risk, yes.’
I ran my hands through my hair in torment.
‘If I leave now, I could make it back before dawn,’ I murmured, grabbing my black cloak.
Alzbeta remained by the window, gazing at me.
‘I should come with you, help you look for it.’
I smiled and caressed her pale cheek.
‘No, dear one. You are important. I’d rather know you here, safe.’
At my words, her features flushed and her lips parted. I felt her hope blooming once more, but I did not dwell on it. I climbed on the windowsill and turned to glance at her with a smile. I had not lied. In the little time we had spent together, Alzbeta had really become important to me. I knew I would never come to love her the way she wanted me to. But I certainly cared for her, and deeply.
‘Where would Turek hide the shard?’ I asked her.
She scoffed and laughed.
‘Under his pillow, most likely.’
I barked a laugh and jumped down into the dark woods below.
‘Be careful, Damian,’ Alzbeta murmured with the wind.
‘I always am,’ I answered back.