This Is Where I Want To Be

5. Cowardice

Juliet

After my freak-out, I went to the closest bathroom, found an open stall, and came out of my vanished state behind a door. I checked the time. It was about half an hour after school. Charlene and Carl would be waiting for me. She had my bag, and I needed to go home. I felt lousy that I didn't go back to talk to Chris; seeing someone else disappear right before your eyes would make an average person go off the deep end. Even if I couldn't face him, I wanted to know he was okay. Standing around a corner from his class, I waited. A few minutes later, he came from where we were earlier. I sighed, glad it was over for the time being.

I made my way to the gate, where my two friends were with a big group of kids in the parking lot. Everyone was standing around their cars, talking and joking around. We usually bummed a ride from someone. That day, I didn't feel like sitting in a car with a bunch of strangers while they dropped everyone off. I took my bag from Charlene and told them I wanted to walk home. She and Carl were too curious to hear all that happened and agreed readily.

We greeted everyone and made our way out the gate, "Come on, Jules, I'll give you a ride home," Jerry said as we walked past him. He was my biggest mistake in high school so far. I thought he was a good guy when we first got together; a year later, he turned into an absolute idiot. It had been over between us for a long time. Come to think about it, we broke up over the summer holidays just before Chris and I began our staring contest. Jerry wouldn't let us go, and he even got a job at the school after he graduated. He was probably still upset I didn't put out anymore, hoping I'd eventually change my mind. The first time he shouted at me... he also got violent and shoved me on the shoulder. I almost lost it. He should be glad I didn't have my vampire strength yet; I would've killed him and buried his body in another state or donated him to a werewolf pen.

"That's never going to happen, you fool!" I said so everyone could hear me. "I hope all the girls know that Jerry is one of those men who hit women."

Jerry pushed off his car to come at me. Carl stepped forward, warning him with one look. Even if Carl was two years younger, he was taller and muscled.

Pointing at me, Jerry warned, "One day, you will regret leaving me. And one day, your friend isn't going to be there to protect you."

"Yeah?" The day I kill you. I wanted to add but didn't. "I'm not the one that left! If there was a choice between living and dying, Jerry. I would rather die than go back to you... You're one of those guys that think small-town girls are stupid and easy... Anyway, I only make a mistake once."

I knew I was goading him, but I needed to vent, and he was the perfect punching bag. "You're a bitch!" He yelled. "And a whore!"

I flinched at him, pouting my lips for effect, scrunching my face, "But I'm not stupid!" I was both easy and stupid... Nevertheless, I wasn't scared of him and wanted him to know. My reaction had the opposite effect on the rest of the crowd, who burst out laughing at our scrap. Jerry stared down his nose at me with a big smirk, feeling good that everybody took what I said as a joke. Heaven knows what attracted me to the guy in the first place.

The rest of our friends stood closer, older guys who came to pick up girlfriends and could manage him. One of them walked over to Jerry, leaning in, and said something in his ear. They exchanged some more words. The guy wasn't taking no for an answer, so he pushed Jerry into his car and told him to get lost. Jerry was cool until that weird night when his personality did a one-eighty.

We headed down the road, leaving them to sort it out. On the way home, I had to make up some boring tale about Chris, showing Charlene and Carl the sponsorship paper and convincing them that he didn't even mention anything else. Carl and Charlene were actually disappointed and asked me if my crush was over. As soon as Chris's hand ran down my arm... The way I felt when he touched me... It was no longer a crush... In an instant, our worlds had collided, and only time would tell what would happen. Chris was attractive even on an off day. Being so near him, seeing his bronze-brown eyes focused on my lips... Just a kiss away... sealed the deal for me. "No, why would my crush vanish when I finally talked to the guy?"