Burnt Out | J. Kirstein

|02|

"You know each other?" Connie leans onto his knees, trying to get a better look but Ymir is blocking him.

You nod. "We went to school together."

"You look...." Jean's eyes linger over your hair, your lips, and then down your neck. "...different."

You had dyed your hair and cut it differently since high school. The lighter shade it was a year and a half ago was not suiting your state of mind at the time so you changed it.

"Thanks," you give him a forced tight-lipped smile because you're not sure whether it could be considered a compliment or not.

There's a weird silence and then Reiner steps up to you and Jean. "No better way to catch up than playing never-have-I-ever. Y/n, I'm gonna go grab you another drink. More soda this time." He pulls the glass from your hands and heads up the stairs.

You want to object, but if you go home now and sit in your empty dorm room you might start to hate the silence that comes along with being alone. It could be better to be around people. It's funny because just a few minutes ago you were ready to be on your own, but maybe the alcohol is doing it's job now. Making you not mind being around people, especially in a quieter and laid back setting like this.

Jean walks past you to go sit and when he starts to fall down onto the spot beside Marco, the boy places his hand on the cushion.

"This spots reserved," Marco smiles. "Y/n?"

Instead of rejecting it this time, you go over and take a seat. Jean decides to head to where Connie and Ymir are and sits beside the buzz cut haired boy and the arm of the couch.

"So you two are a year a part in grades?" Historia questions.

You shake your head. "We're in the same graduating class, I just graduated early."

Jean eyes you. Maybe he hadn't realized you graduated early. It's not like you had told anyone.

You just up and left without a word.

"Oh okay," she folds her hands in her lap. "Jean, I know you're a freshman, but do you know what you're gonna major in?"

He shrugs. "I'm not sure yet."

Jean from high school was one of the popular guys. He played all the sports, was in a few clubs, and won homecoming king twice. The two of you didn't talk much, but you saw one another often since the groups you associated with coexisted as one and the school was quite small.

He was loud, one step down from a class clown, but he respected his teachers and got decent grades. His whole demeanor has shifted though. He seems almost shy now.

Maybe because he's not in the comfort of high school anymore. He probably was confident in the fact he'd always have people surrounding him. Praising him. Wanting to be him or be with him.

But at college that's thrown out the window. Nobodies can be somebodies. There really aren't labels anymore and no one is defined by that anymore.

Jean was just comfortable back in high school and now he's having to readjust to a different environment. He's also a few thousands miles away from where he grew up. It's new and he must not like change.

You feel for him. You really do.

"No rush," Marco smiles. "Everyone takes a little while to figure it out."

"What's yours again?" Colt questions.

"Teaching," Marco blushes like he's embarrassed and glances at you for a quick seconds. "I'm thinking fourth or fifth grade."