036. unthinkable

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that night was forever imprinted into his memory forever. he wished she knew he regretted everything. and he means everything. if only he told her about zendaya. she's a friend and that's all she'll ever be,

and so, since that night they've never spoke. their last words of goodbye, his mumbled as he watched her walk away with him. his replacement. he hoped she meant what she said, i'll aways love you. words exchanged two months ago. 60 days. 60 nights.

always is never always is it?

sam, finally got his brother out of his solitude. or his 'chamber of depression' as his mother called it when they talked the night before last. and like she said, he wished this upon her. there were thousands of ways he could-of fixed this. it never would-of been fixed if sam never of texted him that she was here. she looked just fine, even better if she ever could look it. her hair was an inch shorter. he always thought she'd look good with short hair like his. maybe one day, if she ever does, they could laugh about it.

one day. even tessa's sad. she's mopped around with him as he looked at the photos of them. one by one, putting them in to an album labeled, 'the worst mistake.' you'd think this wouldn't of affected him this much, maybe he's overexagerating. they always

as the eldest holland got ready for a night out for the premiere of 'moon knight'. the makeup, and hair team arrived at his hotel room. the room was silent from normal conversation. all he did was go on his phone or stay quiet. the team were confused as he'd usually speak an ear off, but not today. or yesterday, or for the past months. of course they look at the articles, and read them while gossiping per usual.

when they finished, he mumbled a thank you, and his assistants covered the rest knowing he wanted to get the night over with. maybe you'd ask why. and he'd say no reason i just hate this shit sometimes.

arriving to the premiere was just as you expected. people everywhere, no one's listening to you and everyone's rude. by everyone he means paparazzi. the ride there was quiet. just the sound of him typing his fingers on the glass, or spinning the rings he has.

once he arrived, straight to the carpet he went. flashing lights surrounded him and others. but from afar he saw a girl, his girl, correction, the girl he lost.

he scoffed under his breath as he saw her with another man, and so hurrying down the carpet wishing it was all over. yes, he wished this upon himself, but he blames zendaya. it wasn't just her fault but his aswell.


as sebastian held the door for her she got off her red dress hitting the ground as she walked. they were arm and arm, linked, while they walked through the carpet. of course she saw him. she always does. earlier, when she talked to liz about her feelings, she called her selfish for having feelings for one guy while with another. but she promised to figure it out. seeing him didn't help though.

his eyes traveled throughout her body, god she hated this. the way she felt at this moment, everything. maybe she was selfish. leading on sebastian, but she still liked him she was just in love with another.

one broke her heart, but every time she saw him it healed over and over again. it's like he was a mad scientist who invented a horrible sickness, but he also invented the cure. and he used it, well more like his body radiated with it, he was the cure.

her thoughts were getting to her, the interviewers shouting knocked her out of the trance. "juliet, juliet! what's next? are you and sebastian dating?" she looked at sebastian whom was smiling right at her, both unsure of what to answer so they ignored it. "you two look beautiful tonight, a real power couple!" another shouted making the two smile as a thank you. "tom's here today what do you think about that?" "why'd you and tome break up?" "have you looked at him? he arrived alone." she ignored each and everyone, except the last. her head moved towards the reporter who last spoke.

he continued, "a source told me he isn't with anyone. is this a sign for you two to get back together? i think so!" sebastian's eyes rolled as the man spoke. he began to walk down the carpet with her slowly following behind. he pulled her in now side hugging, he leaned towards her ear, "don't mind their questions they just want a reaction and a good picture." she nodded as she felt his breath on her neck. "you look good babe." he whispered before kissing her cheek for the cameras.

soon, they finished the monstrous carpet scene they quickly found their seats. to the right of her sat sebastian and to the left it was empty. "excuse me, sorry, sorry, thank you, almost there, alright." the voice to the left of her said before they sat next to her. she secretly wished it wasn't him but that it was. and it was.

"oh juliet! fancy seeing you here." he said trying to make light of the seemingly awkward situation.

she internally groaned, "i suppose people here love their drama." he laughed at her small joke.

god i never ask for much but please say he has the wrong seat. i know i promised i'd choose but not tonight.

the silence filled the row as soon as sebastian placed his hand on her left leg which was crossed on top of her right. tom's jaw clenched which she saw from the corner of her eye.

kill me now.

since she knew she'd be stuck here for the next hour or so, she began to fully take in his appearance. he was wearing a black suit which was tight in the nice places like around his biceps. had he been working out? she shook her head as she turned back forward. tom peaked his head to see sebastian talking to the man next to him, he took the chance moving her hair that covered her ear aside, "if you're going to be looking at me, at least give me a complement." he whispered into her ear. chills ran through her body.

she turned to him after she let out a deep breath, "you look nice, thomas." he smiled at her, "see that wasn't so hard!" he joked. "now let me."

he examined her body once again, the red dress looking oh so amazing on her per usual. as he looked back up he spoke, "i think you look really beautiful tonight." the words felt amazing to hear, but hurt too. just as she was about to speak, the lights dimmed and everyone began to lower their voices. the speaches commenced just before the episode began.

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