[Steveboy] Tell Me You're Alright

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Warnings - Mentions of Johnny's and Dallas' deaths, PTSD, Depression, and Heart Break

I've gotten so emotionally attached to Johnny and Dallas that writing this chapter left me in tears and I was sobbing so I hope you enjoy it.

Angst

Ponyboy's POV
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Everything was happening way too quickly. One moment I was running away with Johnny, the next, someone is dead, and we were now fugitives. The church is set ablaze, a rumble, Johnny dies, Dallas goes insane...Dallas is gone too. In only a week, I lost 2 people. Johnny looked at me slowly. "Stay gold Ponyboy...Stay gold..." He died, and I felt like my heart was taking a huge hit. I tried to grab his body, but then I was somewhere else.

The gang and I were running down towards the lot. Where we were gonna meet with Dallas to hide him. It was too late, and the police had caught up to him first. He pulled his gun out of his pocket. Dallas, you idiot! They don't know it's just a bluff! Please, don't! I thought, but it was too late. BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! The officer's gunshots rang out in my head, and I sat up in bed in a cold sweat. I was breathing heavily and started tearing up, silently sobbing to myself.

Sodapop must've woken up because I felt his arms around me. "Pony...was it about them again..?" He asked softly. I hated when he said like that...just they. Johnny wasn't just a young greaser who had gotten into some bad luck, and Dallas wasn't just some hood. They were some of my best buddies, and now they're gone forever. "Pony." He said a bit sternly. I only nodded and looked down. "Yeah, it was about them...I'll be fine," I mumbled, and Sodapop sighed.

"Ponyboy you keep saying that. Those dreams of yours ain't getting any better, maybe Darryl is right we should get you some help-" I grit my teeth and turned to him. "I don't need any help I'm perfectly fine." I laid back down under the covers and shut my eyes. "Whatever you say, little brother." He laid back down as well and seemed to have fallen asleep. I was too scared to fall back asleep. I didn't want to dream about them again.

I slowly got out of bed and grabbed my pack of cigarettes. I saw Two-bit on the couch sleeping, but I ignored him and went outside. I sat on the front steps and lit a cigar, taking a puff. I'd been getting more addicted to these since then. What about everything at Bucks that was Dallas'? Does he even know..? I thought to myself. I frowned and then got up slowly and turned back to my house. "Just one more time..." I mumbled and then slowly left the house.

I ran without stopping until I got to the door of Buck's place. My heart was racing, my lungs were burning, and my legs were aching. I regained my breath and then knocked on the door. "C'mon Buck answer..." I mumbled silently, being hopeful. Soon enough, the door opened, and Buck looked at me. "Dallas isn't here kid get lost." He said coldly. I frowned and took a shaky deep breath. "Dallas is gone Buck...he lost it and killed himself by the police." I tried to stay as calm as possible, but I knew it wouldn't work.

His eyes widened for a moment. "Shoot...I'm guessing that dark toned friend of yours passed and that's what caused him to snap wasn't it?" He guessed. I only nodded in response. "Come on, I don't have all day." He led me up to Dallas' old room and grabbed a few bags from another room. "Take whatever you want, I think Dallas would want you to have some of his stuff anyways. I'll keep some for myself but you should take some too."

He took a drag of the cigarette he was smoking and waited while I grabbed a few things from the room. Mainly whatever jewellery I could find, some cigarette packs I found and some of his jackets and shirts. One of the bags in my hands was full, and I tied up the top of it. "Alright, I got all I wanted...What're you gonna do with the rest?" I knew Buck didn't like me, but I think he was only being nice for the sake of Dallas. "Gonna keep this room in good condition and make this place some kind of memorial. A place I can remember good times I had with him."

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