Brighter Than The Stars: Book One

𝒞𝒽𝒶𝓅𝓉𝑒𝓇 𝒯𝒽𝒾𝓇𝓉𝓎-𝐹𝑜𝓊𝓇: 𝐹𝑜𝓇𝑒𝓋𝑒𝓇 𝒴𝑜𝓊𝓇 𝐹𝓇𝒾𝑒𝓃𝒹

Madeline had been awake for twenty-seven hours straight by the time she opened the front door to her house and saw the two boxes in the entryway. One had everything she'd left at his apartment, while the other held every letter he'd written, but never sent.

"How about I make us some dinner?" Her dad suggested.

With the turning of her stomach for the last fifteen hours, Madeline knew there wasn't a chance in hell of any food staying down. Still, she nodded to her father, wanting to do this part alone.

After dragging the heavy box over to the couch, Madeline picked up the first letter.

Maddie,

My dad died last night, and my first thought should have been 'that fucker's dead', but it wasn't. My first thought was that I could finally reach out to you. I'd be able to hear your voice, and how grown-up it sounded, I could see how much of what I envisioned was right, and what I got terribly wrong. More than anything, I'd be able to see that smile again.

I remember when I used to go to your house, and I was seconds away from breaking down. You'd see me and give me a smile that would light up the world. I knew you weren't stupid and weren't just a child unable to read between the lines. You saw my pain, and you did what you could to give me a small piece of joy.

I could never thank you for that, or tell you just how much that meant to me. Now that he's dead, I'll be able to say those words I've been waiting to say. I'll be able to tell you just how special you truly were.

You may very well have moved on from me, and that's okay. It's what I've always wished for you. Your heart's always been too good for the likes of me. That's probably why I was so amazed you gave it to me freely back then. All of you had. You and your parents were my family and always will be.

-E

M&M,

One of my friends found the only picture I have of you when he went to look for batteries for my remote. When he asked who you were, I felt this sharp pain in my chest. It legit caused me physical pain to talk about you out loud. I've been doing it for years on paper, in my mind, and occasionally to the therapist. But telling the people in my life about the most important person they never knew, maybe will never know, fucking wrecked me.

But I did it, and it became easier the more I spoke. Before I knew it, I'd been talking about you and my old life for over an hour. It was the most I'd ever opened up to anyone in my life. On the one hand, it was freeing. I allowed someone in, and they didn't run scared. Just listened, and let me speak. On the other had, you've been my best kept secret far such a big part of my life, that it felt like I was losing what made my memories special just by sharing them.

Yours is still the greatest friendship I've ever had, M&M. I may learn to let people inside my fucked up world, but you aren't being replaced. It's because of you I could do it at all. You still give me strength, Maddie.

Forever Your Friend,

E

Maddie,

I was at the grocery store today, and I saw someone out of the corner of my eye. It was a young woman, at least I assume, with dark curls and a sweet laugh, who was checking out a register. I was three people behind her and never saw her face.

There were people behind me in line, and I was stuck in place. I wanted to follow her right out the door. I wanted to see her face, even if just for a second.