Hopelessly Drowning

Chapter 4

A/N: 

Hi guys, here is Chapter 4. 

I am trying to get in a regular schedule for updating and I am thinking Mondays and Fridays or possibly just Mondays. What do you guys think?

This chapter will introduce a couple of new characters before we get into the "meat" of the story. 

Please comment as you read, it really helps and it also lets me know how you are liking the story and how I can improve. I am always open to constructive criticism and I am always looking for new ways to learn and grow as a writer. 

Enjoy!

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The walls of my new room were a whitish-blue that reminded me of the sky on a cloudy day. The room was bare and simple, a queen-sized bed with white sheets and a dark brown dresser. The room looked almost clinical and reminded me of the room I had stayed in at the hospital.

"Do you like it? I know it is pretty bare, but you can decorate and make it all your own." Riley's voice piped from the doorway as she watched me scan the room.

I just nodded in response, her words sounding foreign. My room. Nothing was mine anymore. Maybe one day these walls would be adorned with pictures and drawings and memories. Maybe one day this room would become home to somebody. That person wasn't me. I would be long gone in a few weeks, this house was just a stop on a journey to nowhere.

Kids like me never stop running, running from our past, our emotions, and our memories. We just keep running until our past catches up and we are too tired to fight anymore.

"Well, you can unpack your stuff and get familiar with the room while dinner is being made. I will come up and get you when dinner is ready." Riley's voice snapped me out of my thoughts, and I swallowed, my throat suddenly dry. My shoulders hunched with fear and reluctance. The mere thought of going back to the brightly lit kitchen filled me with dread.

Riley didn't seem to notice my reluctance as she placed my backpack on the bed along with a clear Ziploc bag.

"We have some basic toiletries for you like a toothbrush, toothpaste, soap, and the best part, lotion. I picked that one out! It smells like mangoes, and the packaging is really pretty! Not that I think we should be shallow and judge things by their cover but-" She rambled on, hands waving about and cheeks flushing with excitement.

"I'm sure I will love them Riley, thanks." I cut her off before she got too animated. She beamed, her face shining with pride. Her bubbly demeanor was endearing, I felt myself wanting to protect that childish innocence. To make sure the world would never take from her what it had taken from me.

Oblivious to my thoughts, Riley skipped out of the room, the remnants of her smile still on her face.

Turning back to the items on the bed, I sighed looking at the small backpack that held all that was left of the only life I had ever known. I sat down on the bedspread, relief instantly spreading through me as I dropped the crutches, releasing tension in my arms and shoulders.

The bedspread was soft and smelled faintly of lavender, the sheets were cool in my hands. I couldn't remember the last time I had slept on a proper bed. It felt wrong, underserved.

Looking around the room in a house that wasn't mine in a town I'd never been in and surrounded by people I didn't know, I'd never felt so alone. I felt insignificant, worthless, just like he had always said. For the first time since he died, I truly believed it. His words had become my truth, presenting themselves as a constant reminder in my mind.