Shades of Grey

Chapter 19

As part of her physical therapy, Hermione had to go on daily walks, rebuilding the muscle mass in her legs.

She was completing her lap around the Janus Thickery Ward with Harry who had also brought Crookshanks.

Crooks was currently in her arms; Harry had put a featherlight charm on him, she wasn't allowed to use magic for another week.

"So, what's happened to er- Guild?"

Harry glanced at her. "I'm not sure if-"

Hermione glared and Crooks also turned to sneeze angerily.

"He's dead," he said quickly, running a hand through his hair. A habit he and Malfoy shared.

"Dead," she repeated quietly.

She wasn't sure how she felt about that, unable to be brought to justice.

"How?"

"Hermione..."

She stopped walking. "I deserve to know."

"Does it matter?" he asked, crossing his arms with a frown.

"It does to me," she mumbled, not meeting his eyes.

Harry sighed, looking torn. "He - er - blew himself up."

Her eyes widened.

Some of the knowledge of his profile was returning and she supposed suicide or suicide by Auror would make sense.

"There was so much blood, Hermione," Harry said, his voice quiet. "We really didn't think you'd make it. And if you miraculously did, be permanently living in this ward."

"Just lucky, I supposed," she murmured, holding Crookshanks tighter to her chest.

Lucky, but she'd definitely never be the same. Hermione would be dependent on potions for the rest of her life, there would always be gaps in her impeccable memory, and her PTSD was manageable in a controlled environment at St. Mungos, but there was no telling how her mind would react being outside of the ward.

For now, she would be staying at Grimmauld Place after discharge next week. However, she felt like a burden on the growing family.

Harry suggested staying with Ron but she thankfully remembered she was still mad at him (much to his disappointment when he visited a few days ago) and turned the idea down.

She missed her independence and thought herself to be rather stubborn, but even she knew she needed the extra support while recovering.

Harry kissed her temple, placing a hand on her lower back to encourage their walk back to her room.

He cleared his throat. "So, er - you and Malfoy, yeah?"

Hermione blushed, thinking back to their early morning activities. "Yeah," she said quietly, chewing on her bottom lip.

There were still some gaps in her memory on their relationship, but given this had been a recent development, it was taking longer to remember.

They hadn't exactly labeled what they are or what they were. She felt there was something important she was missing but the knowledge was still out of reach.

"I'm surprised he still... wants me," she said quietly, voicing an anxious thought.

Harry was fidgety and awkward. He wasn't the best with these types of conversations. This was a Ginny-kind of conversation.

"Malfoy was... a mess," Harry sighed, collecting his thoughts. "He really cares about you."

She chewed on the inside of her cheek as they reached her suite, wiping the sweat from her brow at the exertion of her walk.