BTS HYYH Notes (Book 1, 2, BUS Game) // COMPLETE [Part 1]

2022, Apr 11 - Seokjin (Yoongi Focused Loops)

[Places: His room, road, workroom, hideout]

I open my eyes to the familiar ceiling. My thoughts are complicated. I couldn't stop Yoongi this time, either. Why did it change this time? At first, I thought it was because I got involved in the wrong ways. But even if I don't do anything, Yoongi still backs himself into a corner. Different time, different place. It's different from Namjoon. Yoongi's accident doesn't have another person or situation involved. I need to think differently.

Yoongi's problem might be coming from within. If all the variables that make Yoongi's accident unpredictable have been inside Yoongi all this time, then the only way I can stop it is if by truly understanding Yoongi. How does Yoongi view the world and himself? What do I need to do to understand him?

I take out a camcorder from inside a box on top of my bookcase - the one I carried all through high school. There might be a clue here. I want to know what Yoongi was like back then. I turn the camcorder on and the images of our school selves flow out.

"Oh, where's Jimin-ie?"

"Jimin went to the bathroom."

"He did? Then, should we... Play a little prank?"

Yoongi: No, don't torment the kid.

"It's not tormenting him! It's just showing affection!"

An excited Taehyung and Hoseok are in the frame. Yoongi's in the shot, but off in the corner. He's behind them, focused on writing something down.

What's he writing on that paper? Is he drawing out staves? Yoongi sometimes played his own compositions in the classroom hideout, often drawing the staves by hand whenever he started writing a new song. I wonder if he still writes music? Now that I think about it, I think I saw a piano in his workroom... The video ends while I'm lost in thought.

"Should I play another one? This was filmed in the hideout, too."

"Oh, Namjoon hyung!"

Yoongi: This sure is a rare sighting.

"Why do you look so tired?"

"I just... Didn't get enough sleep."

Seeing Namjoon's tired face through the screen jogs my memory about that day. We were quite not to bother him and all ended up falling asleep.

"Should I push some desks together?"

"No, it's okay."

"Why? You can lay down and rest!" As Taehyung and Namjoon quibble...

"Lie down." Yoongi put the desks together and calls Namjoon over.

"I can just put my head on my arms to nap... Thanks, Yoongi hyung."

"Me too, hyung! I want a desk bed, too."

I focus on Yoongi through the entire video, but he's either standing still or outside of the frame with only his voice audible. It's the same thing for photos. I can count on ten fingers the number of solo photos of him. His face is only visible in group photos and most of them were taken when he wasn't looking at the camera. "... This is hard."

I'm still looking at the photos, when...

"It being here is a secret. Okay?"

"... Jeez."

I can hear Yoongi and Taehyung's voices from the camcorder. The video continues. "Was there more?" The frame moves from sleeping Namjoon towards where Taehyung and Yoongi are.