𝐫𝐨𝐜𝐤𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫!

014

monday, october 9th 11:22pm

"WHAT'CHA doing?" mike asked making anais flinch as he opened the door to the music room. she gave him an annoyed expressions and he put his hands up defensively beside mouthing a sorry. anais was sat in a chair in the dim lights of the music room, a binder sat in her lap as she scribbled continuously on a sheet of paper.

"i'm finishing some sheet music.." she chewed on the top of a pencil as mike sat in a chair next to her.

"oh, awesome. you're doing this on acoustic or electric?"

anais glanced at him. "um neither. i doing it on piano."

"you play piano?"

"yeah.. i play guitar- electric, bass and acoustic, piano, violin and the sax."

mike glanced over at the sheet music and she gave an amused smile knowing damn well he had no clue what the notes read. still, it was sweet he made an effort to be interested in her work. it was always nice when someone wanted to see the notes or chords for a song, or ask her what she meant in that lyric in the second system.

"can i hear the song?"

there was a slight pause. "it's not like my usual music, i don't know if you'd like it."

"anais if you made it i'll like it. let me hear the song."

she gave a soft smile before standing up and walking over to the grand piano in the corner of the room. she sat down with mike next to her and set up her binder in the music stand.

"the lyrics aren't definite and might seem a little weird but-"

"just play."

anais took a deep breath before placing her hands on the keys and beginning to play the first verse.

"i don't feel a single thing, have the pills done too much? haven't caught up with my friends in weeks and now we're out of touch. i've been driving in la, and the world it feels too big, like floating ball that's bound to break snow my psyche like a twig."

mike felt himself become sort of hypnotized by her voice. of course he had heard the girl sing, he had her cds. but this was different, the way she sang when preforming with wildchild was completely different than how she sang alone. her entire voice changed to this light, soft tone.

"and i just wanna see if you feel the same as me.. do you ever get a little bit tired of life? like you're not really happy but you don't wanna die? like you're hanging by a thread but you gotta survive cause you gotta survive...like your body's in the room but you're not really there, like you have empathy inside but you don't really care, like you're fresh out of love but it's been in the air, am i past repair? a little bit tired of trying to care when i don't, a little bit tired of quick repairs to cope. a little bit tired of sinking there's water in my boat i'm barely breathing tryna stay afloat so i got got these quick repairs to cope.. guess i'm just broken and broke."

she tried to ignore the stinging feeling of tears pricking at her eyes as she sang. "the prescriptions' on its way, with a name i can't pronounce. and the dose i've gotta take? boy i wish that i count. cause i just wanna see if this could make me happy.."

she stopped singing after that and cleared her throat before closing the binder. "it would go back to the chorus after that. it's just an idea though.."

mike was quiet for a second before he spoke up. "ana, that song is incredible. are you gonna release it?"

she shook her head. "no."

"why?"

anais sighed and threw her head back to control her emotions. "because i'm the teenage idol, mike. the world can't know their favorite rockstar is on antidepressants."