Stare

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Charlie was laying with Nick in his bed, Nellie between them, their hands intertwined. It was one of their typical "dates," though they hardly called it that, and just referred to it as a casual hangout. Charlie didn't care how it was labeled. The only thing he cared about was spending time with his boyfriend, Nick.

He turned to face him, Nellie jumping down off the bed and out of the room.

"She's hyper today," Nick said with a laugh.

Charlie nodded, smiling, and moving a little closer to Nick, so their bodies were almost touching. Nick stared at him unapologetically, his movements in slow motion as he admired him.

"What's wrong?" Charlie asked, his face blank.

"Nothing, you're just amazing. And so beautiful."

Charlie blushed. Nobody ever gave him compliments like that, not even Tao, his best friend. He never felt special, but in this moment, he was.

"You're really beautiful too," he replied, awkwardly avoiding his glance and staring up at the ceiling.

He saw Nick smile mindlessly, and his heart pounded faster. When he got bored, he peeked back over to Nick, and they met eyes again.

"Why are you still looking at me, you idiot?" he said, and Nick just beamed.

"Because I want to kiss you. So badly."

They stared into each other's eyes, then suddenly their lips were pressing together, and Nick's hand moved to his cheek.

Charlie moved closer, so their hearts were beating like one, and nothing was separating them from each other. He tasted of mint and chocolate—a combination that Charlie loved, and it left him only wanting more. He wrapped his arm around Nick's waist, pulled him in closer—if that was even possible. Their mouths moved against each other effortlessly and recklessly, each time better than the last.

Suddenly, Nick rolled them over, so he was on top, and he pressed Charlie beneath him.

"So that's how you're going to play?" Charlie asked, grinning.

"Shut up and kiss me again."

Their lips crashed together again, this time more desperate and ferocious. Nick's tongue slid into his mouth, and Charlie felt a wave of worry sleep over him, and he pulled away, backing himself up against the wall that was perpendicular to the bed.

Nick was by his side in an instant. "Are you okay? What happened?"

Tears immediately formed in his eyes, and he tried his best to keep them back, but they started falling from his eyes. Nick kept his distance, giving him space.

"I'm so sorry, Nick," Charlie said, wiping his eyes.

"Hey, stop. Remember, I banned you from saying that?"

Charlie nodded reluctantly, scrunching up into a ball and putting his head in his lap.

"What's wrong? Talk to me. I'm always here for you."

"It's just—remember that time, it was just after I met you, after rugby practice, and Ben kind of attacked me a little?" Charlie felt the tears coming back to his eyes. "I just remembered that, and it made me scared."

Nick said nothing, his eyes glazed over as he continued to look at Charlie.

"I'm sorry, I'm a horrible boyfriend, I-"

Nick cut him off. "Stop saying sorry when it isn't your fault, Char."

"Char?"

"Oh, come on, not this again..." he said, putting his head down. "But that's besides the point. You don't need to apologize for anything. For Ben, for Harry, for no one. They should be the ones apologizing to you for every horrible thing they've done. I should be apologizing too, for pushing you too far." 

"It's not your fault," Charlie said quickly.

Nick smiled, a sad look in his eyes. "Now, is there anything I can do to make you feel better?"

"Kiss me?"

"Wow, what a chore," he replied, and they grinned at each other, and kissed again, this time a little less intensely. When they broke apart, Nick wiped the remnants of tears from Charlie's face.

"I love you," Nick said, and it caught Charlie off guard.

"Oh—" he exclaimed, flustered and still out of breath. "I—I love you too."

Nick smiled, and they kissed a last time, this time just a quick peck on the lips.

Charlie still didn't know how he got this lucky.

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