Personal Model - P5R

Prologue - Maruki's Counseling Session

Y/N's P.O.V.

The Shujin Academy Festival. I've been here before, I know I've been here before, but that must've been a different universe. It's like... being put back in my place. A long sleeve Kosei shirt with the traditional black skirt and ugly shoes. We came here for a reason and my head is full, yet I don't know why.

A man with dark brown hair and wearing a lab coat walks around the hall. He has glasses on, and he isn't half bad looking either. 

"I don't think I've seen you before," he says. "My name is Maruki."

"My name is L/N. How are you?"

He says he's fine. He looks a little pale, which doesn't say much considering he's about the same color as Yusuke, but it's not necessarily a healthy pale. He asks how I am, and I say the same. "Don't you have a homeroom?"

He shakes his head and gives me a crooked smile. "No, I'm the school... therapist? I'm here for PR reasons." He doesn't want to stop there, but he does. "You don't go here?"

I look down at my button-up. "No, no. I have a couple of friends that go here. They invited me and I didn't have anything else I needed to get done. I've never been to Shujin but it seems like a nice school."

"It is. The time I've spent here has been nice. I can't say anything bad about the kids I've spoken to." That right there confirms that he's seen me with everyone else. "Is there anyone you wish was here with you?"

"I don't think I understand your question."

He smiles again, this time with a cautious undertone. Looking back on it, I shouldn't have asked him to repeat his question. The caution went over my head. "You don't have anyone that you want to be here with you?"

I let Yusuke slip my mind. I imagine that every single day he works here and talks to some girl, at least one of them slips the 'my boyfriend is so mean to me' card. 

"I think my cousin would enjoy it. A student from another fancy school would enjoy it."

He nods. "Is he out of town this weekend?"

"No." The word comes out harsher than I plan. "He is no longer with us."

"My condolences," he whispers, bowing his head. "If there is anything I can-"

"No, thank you. He's been gone for ten-some years."

The air grows still around me. Time has frozen and I can feel my urge to cry building up. I think Maruki notices, and he offers to go sit with me outside as I get myself together. 

Shujin still has the roof taped off. I've been up here once before, I believe. The psychiatrist slash therapist slash whatever he is has a key that takes us through the door. It's a thick metal door that slams shut behind us, almost like locking in my fate in a way. 

Maruki gestures to a bench for me to sit on. He stands at one end, looking out over the entrance of the school. There's a moment of silence as I wipe at my eyes, then he says: "I understand."

"Do you?"

"In a different way, per se. Mine was my long-time girlfriend."

I wait for him to elaborate. He doesn't, so I assume it was a not good way to go out and keep my mouth shut. Maruki pinches his nose and blinks really hard once. "Was it long ago?"

"No."

"My condolences." I sound like a robot, but there's nothing else to say.

"Thank you."

It's awkward, then he turns it into a long sentence. "This is what making connections is. You know? We have one thing in common, yet there are differences in each of our stories." He hums.  "What did you say your last name was?"

Oh no. "L/N." I swallow thickly.

"Oh, I've heard of you. You're related to the former cognitive psience researcher. I apologize, I cannot remember your mother's name. That, and..."

I want to tell him to stop. My mouth is clamped shut and I can't get it to open back up.

"Makoto Yuki. I remember the news from several years back."