THIS GIRL

2|

It's Thursday after school Ryan actually walked with me part of the way home from the transportation center since my second bus was taking forever to get there. We split ways about half way the route since, obviously, our houses are in different directions.

As I walk up to my house I see my dad sitting on the front steps of our house with his hands pressed to his cheeks. He hasn't done this since mom died.

"Hey dad." "Emma, hey sweetie." "What are you doing outside?" I say. "Waiting for you." "For what?" "To give you this." He hands me a small yellow box. "What is it? You're freaking me out."

I open it and there is a key. "Here." Dad hands me the garage door opener key. I push the button and inside is a little old yellow VW bug. "It's yours." He says. I couldn't tell you how old it is but the paint is chipped, the seat cushion has some tears but it's totally fine with me. "I love it." "Well let's test drive it!" Dad says far too enthusiastically.

"Dad, if you're doing this because you think a car is some kind of incentive for me to tolerate Natalia, I can't take it." "It's not." He says. "Are you sure?" "Yes." "Thank you so much." I give him a hug and realize I never actually hug my dad anymore. Not since I dropped out.

I thought my life was going to be over. My mom had died years prior but I wasn't completely over it. I hated having to deal with her being gone and having to figure out what to do newly diagnosed with depression and generalized anxiety. I had panic attacks since I was a kid since I've had OCD for years, I never told anyone because I didn't really know what was going on at the time. It was all just coming to a boil too quickly. I couldn't be burned so I had to turn the stove off before completely evaporating.

I remember my friends telling me I just didn't want to leave because I was sad about my mom. Sad? I wasn't sad, I was numb. Didn't want to leave? They had no idea how bad I wanted to get out.

I start to pull out of the garage when the girls come out of their house from across the street, assuming they saw what was going on. "You know what, I'll let you girls have fun." Dad says.

"Thanks dad, seriously."

"Get in you guys." I say. "You strike again Ben, for worlds best dad." Sophia says getting in the backseat. "And hottest." Chloë says. "Please don't start this." I say, it's a good thing he didn't hear that.

Calla takes front seat. "Where do we hit first?" She says. "FOOD!" Sophia shouts.

I drive us to get some snacks and junk at a liquor store and we stay to eat it in the parking lot.

"So Ryan is back." I say. I hadn't spoken to the girls since Monday a day before the first day of school. "And the fling will continue." Chloë says. "I didn't have a fling with him." "But God knows you wanted to." She says. "The fair was your chance and you did nothing about it." Sophia says. "I was preoccupied." "And know you're not." She says.

"You should invite him to the show we're going to next weekend." Calla says. "And now we all have a ride and won't have to take the train up to T.O." We're only about forty minutes from Thousand Oaks, an hour to two hour bus ride. "I don't even know if I want to go yet, but I'll consider it. When are guys getting your car back anyways?" I say. "When Sophia and Chloë get their act together and show up to school." Calla says.

They go to the towns community college now. They started a month ago and haven't really been prioritizing their time well. They're forced to take the bus or walk since they got in a fender bender from ditching class and going to see their special guy friends. Their parents took the car away since they're not using it for school purposes. If they're not ditching to see their guys, they're working at their parents accounting office. They're, of course, upset with their parents taking away their car as "adults".