I'm Scared To Get Close, I Hate Being Alone! // An Oli Sykes Fanfic

~Chapter 16~

A/N- I guess this is just a filler chapter, mainly just saying what Amelia is thinking. Also that picture is Amelia's hair. Enjoy!

-Mimi x

{{3 MONTHS LATER}}

I guess not a lot has happened.

Alix is still in a coma and showing no signs of recovery, we've been visiting her at least every other day and she just lays there, still.

I got a new job at a local record shop, its not much but I guess I get paid enough to eat.

Oli and the rest of the guys talked about the band idea more and actually decided to go for it. They called the band Bring me the Horizon and have been doing a few gigs in pubs (etc.) but not too much.

Austin Carlile from Of Mice & Men is supposed to be coming down to a local bar in a few days and the guys have a gig booked then so they've all been excited for that.

But apart from that it's still the same.

Oli still lives with me and my dad (whose never around), I only ever see Jordan and Sam when we organise to go see Alix.

But every day is the same:

-Wake up

-Have breakfast

-Go jogging

-Go to work

-Visit Alix

-Eat dinner

-Sleep

This same cycle occurs every day, every one quiet since the accident. Me and Oli aren't the same, the only time we see each other is in the morning and evening. I mean I still love him immensely, and that will never change, but life is so quiet and still. I miss when Oli and I would binge watch Netflix or go out to picnics or dinner and when we would all go to parties but most of all I just miss Oli and I talking.

Talking to each other the way we should not just saying, "hi," in the morning and, "goodnight," in the evening.

I guess you would even expect us to sit together on the couch in the evenings after visiting Alex but we don't. One of us makes dinner and then we sit, a gap between us, until we go to sleep.

And it's been like this 3 months straight.

----------------------------------------------------

"Maybe you should just leave!" I read on the pages of my book. My eyes skim through the lines, not actually reading any of the book but a few phrases or words, but instead flick through my life, everything.

From being only young; my addictions and problems; moving to Sheffield and the feeling of being with my dad; the feelings I felt when I first saw Oli and then the feelings of getting partnered with him (this put a large smile on my face); meeting my bestfriends. My mind then instantly went to the time of my birthday; the feeling of dancing and laughing all night but not having a drop of alcohol; the feeling when my heart fluttered as Oli carried me to the front room and the smirk on his face when he said he had another surprise for me and then I saw it again; my memory when he got ripped out of my grasp; when he was hit and beat and I tried to help but I only got beaten my self; when he pulled out that gun and I heard the noise of the bullet; his body laying in a pool of blood on the floor. I look down to my book and see the ink rundown the page, I look over and see Oli lying in bed in a pool of blood; a bullet wound.

"AHHHH!" I scream, sitting up from my bed. My heart thumping out my chest, sweat dripping from my hairline. I lift my knees to my chest and push my head down as far as I can, trying to control my breathing. I feel an arm wrap around my shoulders and before I knew it I was cuddled up in Oli's arms.

I closed my eyes to savour the moment; my heart had settled and now I was just enjoying being in Oli's arms once again.

"I missed this," Oli whispered breaking the silence between us.

"Me too," I whispered in reply. A small drop of water began to run down my face before I felt Oli's arms tighten their grip around me.

"What's happened between us, Oli?" I watch as Oli closed his eyes, looked down and took a long breath, refusing to look at me.

"I don't know," he finally said, as though embarrassed or just plain fed up. Looking at his facial expressions I pulled away; I layed on my back and starred up at the ceiling not knowing what to feel right now. After a small moment of silence he cupped my face pulled it to only centimetres away from his, pushing my hair behind my ears.

"I still love you Amelia and I always will, you know that? This is only a rough patch because of the accident with Alix and soon this will all be over, I promise you." I smile spread across my face until his lips crashed with mine.

The rest of the morning consisted of me lying in Oli's arms. We didn't speak or move only savoured the moment that we had been missing for a long time until we both fell back asleep.

----------------------------------------------------

I woke up to a bright flash in my eyes, my phone. I slowly began to open my eyes to see a message from my dad

From: Dad

Be back at noon

I checked the time to see

10:46 am

As I began to flick through my Tumblr and Instagram I start to play back all that me and Oli discussed last night, until I stood up. I ran over to my wardrobe and pulled out some ripped black leggings; a long tank top; a long kimono and some vans. Chucking it all together I sat on my desk, trying to not to wake Oli, and stuck on some foundation, powder, mascara and filled in my eyebrows a little bit. I grabbed a paper and pen and wrote:

I'll be back by noon! Taken dads car.

-Amelia x

Before running down stairs; grabbing my phone, purse and Dad's keys and a bottle of water from the fridge before leaving out the door. Getting in my Dad's car I stick my dirty blonde hair in a loose ponytail before starting the car. I drive down town before stopping outside the hairdressers. Taking a deep breath I get out the car, lock it, and then enter the shop.

"Hi," I asked a young, redheaded women at the desk.

"Anything I can do?" she replied in a warm tone. Her eyebrows were sharp and coloured the same as her hair and her cheeks were rosy along with her lips.

"I was wondering if I could get fitted in today? As soon as possible."

"15 minutes?"

"Perfect, thanks."

"So what you thinking?"

"Eh, something crazy," I answer in a hasty however, humorous tone as I sit down to wait.

It's time for a change.