Shadows Whisper | | Azriel

38

Astryn's determination to train with Rhys had dwindled almost as quickly as it had sparked in her. She hardly even had the energy to get out of bed, and no one was willing to try to convince her to get up. And even if they had been willing to, Azriel standing outside her door glaring at anyone who dared to come close was enough of a deterrent.

Azriel knew somewhere in the back of his mind that he would eventually have to stop enabling this, that eventually he would have to try to talk her into getting up and finding a way to live. He wasn't ready for that yet, though. He wanted to give her time first, to give her a chance to get up on her own. But if she didn't get up soon, he knew he would have to do something. He wouldn't let her just waste away in bed.

It took three day before Astryn finally got up again. Azriel was asleep when she did, resting in a chair beside her bed. It was the first time in the last three days he had slept, and he was out cold.

Astryn was oddly grateful for that. She didn't want to talk to him, or anyone, at the moment.

She got out bed quietly and left the room, shutting the door behind herself. She tried to make her way to the dining room, but the house was large and she got lost.

"You look confused," a winged male commented, voice surprisingly gentle. It took Astryn a few seconds to recall his name—Cassian.

"Sorry," she muttered, not knowing what else to say.

"No, no, don't be sorry," he dismissed, giving a kind smile. "Where are you trying to get to?"

"The dining room," she answered, her face a little red with embarrassment, "I'll find it."

"I can walk you there," Cassian offered, to which Astryn faltered slightly.

Her mind flashed back to the Autumn Court, to Azriel handing her over to Cassian with complete trust in him.

"That would be very helpful," Astryn replied, "thank you."

Cassian gave a dismissive hum and walked with her, leading her through the hallways.

"What are you doing up so early?" Cassian made conversation, the silence feeling a little too tense.

"I didn't realize it was early," she replied simply, and it was true. She hadn't paid much attention to anything, only able to focus on how hungry she was.

"Sunrise is soon," he told her, "I usually wake up three hours before sunrise, then Az wakes, then Rhys, then Mor. No clue when Amren wakes up."

Astryn decided against asking why he knew the order everyone wakes up in.

"I've never seen a sunrise before," she didn't know why she confessed that, or why it made her realize she couldn't recall ever seeing a sunset before either.

"Really? You haven't seen it through the window in your room?" he asked, trying to hide how sad it made him.

"I closed the drapes," she said, and found herself adding on, "the sun can be a bit...overwhelming, if that makes sense."

It made sense. It made a painful amount of sense. She was kept in a cave with no light for the first twenty years of her life. Of course the sun was overwhelming. Of course she hadn't ever seen a sunrise. Cassian swallowed back his sadness and forced a smile.

"Let's get you your breakfast and then I'll show you out to the training ring and we can sit and watch the sunrise if you'd like," he offered, feeling a little foolish for it when she looked at him like he had suddenly grown a second head.

"I—okay," she responded, putting a ridiculous amount of effort into not crying.

Cassian nodded but didn't speak, staying quiet and letting her process whatever was going through her head.

She got pancakes for breakfast, and he carried the plate for her as they headed outside. They sat side by side on the ground and stared up at the sky.

Astryn's eyes widened at the sunrise, and she kind of hated herself for the tears that fell. It felt like such a foolish thing to cry over. It was just a sunrise. Just a sunrise even if it was the first one she had seen in twenty years.

"I'm sorry," Cassian spoke up quietly, "for everything they took from you. I know it probably doesn't mean much, but I truly am sorry you had so much stolen from you."

More tears fell, and Astryn couldn't find words. Cassian didn't press for her to speak. He just sat quietly by her side, a silent unwavering supporter.

Her mind flashed back to the Autumn Court again, to being in his arms and mumbling incoherently about wanting Azriel.

"He'll be here soon," Cassian had said, "he's coming. I swear on my life I'll keep you safe until you're in his arms again."

It was only after he said that that she had allowed herself to stop fighting to stay conscious through the pain, because despite not knowing Cassian, she had believed him. She had trusted entirely that he would keep her safe and make sure she got back to Azriel.

"I know this adjustment isn't easy," Cassian spoke again once Astryn stopped crying, "I can't even imagine how it must feel, but you will survive it. You will be okay, and you have us to help you get there. Whatever happens, you are a part of our family now and you will always have us for whatever you need."

"I...thank you," she said, voice barely above a whisper, "thank you."

Cassian dismissed the thanks entirely, deeming it unnecessary. He opened his mouth to say more, but cut himself off as he noticed the shadows swirling around Astryn. Something about it was so mesmerizing.

"Azriel woke up," she informed him, noticing where his attention was, "they asked if it's okay if they tell him where I am."

Cassian was a little thrown off by that. The shadows were loyal to Azriel, it was shocking to him that they were asking her permission to give him information.

"I didn't know they could speak with anyone other than him," Cassian remarked curiously, "it's still surprising seeing them go to you the way they do with him."

Astryn didn't have time to reply before Azriel was there. Tension visibly drained from him when he got the visible confirmation that she was okay.

"It's good to see you out of bed," he said, soft and hesitant, "are you feeling okay?"

Astryn hesitated before she answered. The answer didn't seem like it could ever be yes, but she was feeling better than she had the last few days—the last twenty years. She just had her first sunrise.

"I think so."