Ginger

3

The morning came. Although I don't know if it can be called morning for me too.

I could feel the rays of light trickling in the window, waiting impatiently to enter the darkest corners of the room. And there stood a girl, still sitting on the floor, with her knees not far apart, folded in front of her face.
I could not see the face, but I could feel the tears that had now dried, causing a slight numbness in the eyes. They can probably be red and swollen. Not like i cared.
Not like he cared!

I wanted so badly to stay there, just me and myself, but it wasn't right for my heart to suffer so much. I managed to stand up and direct my feet towards the shower, throwing all the clothes I had on my body to the ground.
The hot water washes over my body, making me forget for a few minutes that my feet were still on the ground.
Looking at myself in the mirror, I decided to apply a little make-up on my face, although I'm not one for it, I had to hide all the signs of tiredness on my face.

I wore a white dress with small green flowers that hung close to my body, combining it with a pair of white sneakers. My feet were not only tired, but also sore, so heels were the last option I would choose.
As a final detail, I let my hair down, which had now dried and taken on its curly form.

After leaving my room, I walked in the corridor of that house and could see from the long window a person sitting in the garden painting. I knew it was him, although I couldn't see his face as he was on his back. He always finds refuge in drawing when he feels sad or wants to vent his anger. I continued to put my feet one after the other slowly, but with my eyes from the window until I reached the end of the corridor.
A table was set in the living room and I could see two of the maids who kept bringing food to it. I smiled lightly and sat down at the table, thankful that he was too busy with his drawings to be here.

But the smile didn't last long and started to fall slowly as I saw his figure approaching me. He stopped at the door when he saw me sitting there, but I ignored him and started playing with the food as if he didn't exist. I could feel that he took a deep breath, as if to prepare himself, as he approached and sat on the other side of the table.
Neither of us said a word, I still continued to ignore his presence.
What could we say in the end? If he were to speak, the next thing that would come out of his mouth would be a lie. And I, as a fool that I am, could believe it.

"I'm sorry," I heard him whisper as he looked up at me. I continued to play with the food.
Another lie!
"I can explain myself, but I know that nothing justifies this." He continues.
I didn't want him to explain himself because I knew that if he said that everything was a lie and that what he said the day before was not true, I could allow myself to believe it.
He had this power over me.

"Nothing justifies the fact that I made you love me and then hurt you."

"I don't love you." I said, softly, placing the fork in my hand on the table. He raised his eyebrows, clearly confused, looking me straight in the eye.
His eyes hit me like two arrows, but still not a single drop of blood came out, I continued to stay cold.
"I have been thinking, for long." I chewed. Come on Kata, you can do it! I tried to give myself the courage to continue.
"Because i was in love with a version of who i though you were.
I loved someone, yes. But that person is an idea that I created in my mind. You and that person are two completely different people. That person loved me back."