Rough Day by guardianangelicas

Be Brave

This story doesn't belong to me. It belongs to guardianangelicas on AO3.

Even after all that excitement and adventure, if there was ever one single moment with Din you'd want branded into your memory forever, it's this one.

He's asleep.  And no—not because he passed out quicker than you can snap your fingers and then awoke less than two or three hours later at most, not like he always does.  This time, he falls asleep, and then he stays asleep.

The baby is tucked away in his crib, shields closed and hidden inside the quietest part of the Crest, and you've been awake for at least an hour.  You, awake, and Din, asleep.  You could count the times this has happened on one hand, and in other circumstances, you might worry that he's sick or something.  There were a lot of people in Nariss and he could've caught a bug, but then again, he wears a filter over his mouth pretty much all the time, so you wonder how often that actually happens.  No, his body temperature is normal when you lift the back of your hand and fold it along the bend of his neck as he breathes slowly—a few degrees warmer than you, but normal for him.

Is he just that tired?  You blink your eyelashes against the skin of his collarbone, staring at the red and green buttons illuminating through the darkness across from your fluffy, comfortable bed on the floor.  You've seen him come back bleeding and still not rest like this.  You thought you slept for a long time; it was one of those nights where you wake up multiple times, smile when you remember where you are and whose body is pressed tight to yours, before passing back out and thanking the Maker that you can continue to sleep.  After days of bells ringing every hour, a city with enormous crowds roaring, parades clanging, and fireworks booming, you've returned to the most blissful silence you could've ever dreamed.  Hyperspace, Din's skin pressed against yours, and against all reason, waiting in the darkness for him to wake up.

Your cheek is squished against his chest and instead of holding you like normal, his limbs are completely splayed out on the floor spread eagle and... maybe you didn't sleep a long time?  What's more likely?  Your body being okay with operating on less than average naturally or Din finally letting himself relax for far longer than he usually does?  You don't have a clock handy, but you feel well-rested.  Alert.  Maybe it's a little of both?

Part of you is antsy to not be the only one awake—it's so weird— but part of you also wants him to sleep as long as physically possible since he never fucking does it.  You wonder if this has always been in him.  If he was always able to mute his body's natural need to be active, present and ready, or if this is somehow an unintentional change inspired by your cultivated love of the most basic things in life that most people take for granted.  Sleep in the cool, pitch blackness.  Water, freely used and consumed and enjoyed, not hoarded and traded like precious jewels.  Real food, not... dehydrated chalk bought in the barren markets under a blazing hot sun.  It had enough nutrients and fed you well enough, but caf was once a luxury to you, and fruit was, too.  For him, you think they still are to an extent—necessities are luxuries, but what about luxurious necessities?  Long hot showers, mouthwateringly delicious food, sleeping in... those are completely foreign to him unless you give him a real shove, and this time, you think he made the leap all by himself.

His skin is soft under your cheek though, no matter how harsh of a life he's lived.  You're suddenly struck with the realization that he's experienced this multiple times with you, this is what it's like.  Tangled in sheets, hearing him breathe slowly while you hold onto him and stare into the darkness, wide awake.  His body is so warm; you fit perfectly next to him and you'd stay here forever if you could.

Except... you're a bit bored.  Not bored enough to move, obviously, but enough to wish he was awake and interacting.  You must be terrible company if this is how he typically spends his downtime in the mornings, just waiting for you to wake up, and every gentle breath he takes is another moment you consider a way to entertain yourself.