Today, the Weid is blazing mad. He cut his wittle fingy on some broken glass in the sink. He tells us all to clean out the sink - or else. I frantically clean the glassware. Simultaneously, I look for the ooey-gooey goodness of Mr. Weid's finger blood so I can add it to the shrine.
I speed wash the glass, hoping the Weid will appreciate me more. However, a new rival has entered. Antwon sweeps harmoniously - outjimming the Jims. I panic, my clothes soaking wet with the sweat pouring out of me. It reeks. The flies from the school kitchen gravitate towards me and the roaches swarm me. Weid shakes his head in dissatisfaction again. I notice everyone's gaze shifting slowly my way. Antwon's sweeping instincts go into overdrive as he attempts to sweep the sweat puddle but to no avail. He can no longer outjim the Jims. Relieved, my body soaks up the sweat - oh how good it feels to be hydrated once again. But to my surprise, the Weid smailes. I smailes too.
Feeling better and in need to share my creativity and self-expression with the world, I go to the board to draw a smexy picture of myself. Oh yeah this'll have all my love interests foaming at the mouth. Everyone is proud of me as a round of applause quickly ensues. But how could they when I keep messing up the pupils?? I'm shaking violently, my weakness exposed. Now I'm the one frothing at the mouth instead of my hubbies as I keep having to erase.
Now knowing I'm never going to make it big in life, I give up and shuffle back to my seat. Evy majorly shows me up with her drawings. I'm tired of this. I will NOT be humiliated. I hack Mr. Weid's computer and laugh maniacally. Checkmate.
YOU ARE READING
The Diary of Jimotheé Gujjie
RandomA heartthrobbing tale of excitement covering widdle Jim-Jim's shenanigans. Note: This story was written in a google doc during 6th period chemistry. Please, for the love of God, don't take this seriously.
