No Control | HEEHOON 🔞

Part 6 🔞

Sunghoon didn’t know how long he had been in his room alone, crying. He didn’t know what he had done, but he knew it was his fault, he wasn’t enough. His thoughts rapidly spiralled down from there, after Heeseung left the room.

He’d been a fool to think Heeseung would ever want him outside of his rut, the other had ran away as soon as he realized what he had done. And Sunghoon wasn’t even a good enough omega to calm him down. He was a failure, he was hopeless, he had no use. Even if he didn’t want to cry anymore, it hurt, and everything smelt of Heeseung and him and it was not helping. Because Heeseung had been there but he wasn’t there anymore.

Because Sunghoon wasn’t worth it.

And then the door had opened, he didn’t need to look to know who it was, and he kept crying. When Heeseung came closer to him and called his name all tenderly, he had to stop himself from turning and just pulling Heeseung close to him.

“I-I’m not g-good for alpha…” he had said, “I’m u-useless…” He needed him so much, but Heeseung didn’t need him.

He lost the battle when Heeseung got in the nest with him and hugged him close, he couldn’t keep resisting. Not really listening to what Heeseung was saying to him, he turned around and nuzzled and cried and savoured the little gentle touches Heeseung gave him. It took a little for the tears to stop falling and his body to stop shaking, but once that stopped he immediately started purring.

Sunghoon hated himself for not being able to stop it, even though Heeseung obviously didn’t want him and was just trying to calm him down. He hated that he couldn’t stop the feeling of love and pleasure that took over his body just because Heeseung was beside him. He was conflicted, but he’d let the feelings wash over him until his mind became his own again.

Finally, he inhaled Heeseung’s scent, now partially mixed with his own. He smiled softly with his eyes closed, but also a little sadly.

“Heeseung-hyung?” He whispered, sounding even a little scared. Heeseung hummed and he sounded so satisfied and peaceful that Sunghoon didn’t want to part from him, didn’t want to talk about what happened.

But they had to.

“How are you feeling?” and Heeseung sounded like he cared, like he cared for Sunghoon as more than just his friend and groupmate. It almost made him cry again, if Sunghoon hadn’t let his hopes up, he wouldn’t have suffered as much.

“I’m… not okay,” he didn’t want to lie, they had to have an honest conversation, preferably, before either his heat or Heeseung’s rut made them sex crazed again.

“Sorry,” Heeseung started and Sunghoon chuckled, exhausted and resigned, “I’m really sorry.”

“It’s not your fault…” He was playing with his fingers against Heeseung’s chest. He thought they should take a shower soon, they were disgusting.

“But it is, I… I knew this would happen,” Heeseung said, “I shouldn’t have agreed, but I… I couldn’t say no… and I- I didn’t mean to- ugh,” Heeseung dropped his head against the mattress. “I did something terrible.”

Sunghoon’s chest constricted in pain, “please, please don’t say that,” his voice wobbled a little as he held in the tears. “You did nothing wrong…”

“Don’t defend me… I- I claimed you, without asking, without warning I just- I took that from you,” Heeseung hugged him closer, it was tearing Sunghoon apart. “I knew that could, that would happen, and I did my best to not… to resist biting you…” Heeseung sounded like he was falling apart with every word, “but I’m… weak, I did it anyway and… you must hate me…”