Chapter 5- Not what I thought

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Marinette pov-
I swear, Fox Spawn was TRYING to get herself slaughtered.

My friends and I were touring Wayne Enterprises for a class tour, and we were the only ones listening and actively paying attention to the tour guide, Richard Grayson, and he kept giving Lila a murderous glare every time she kept lying about the Wayne's and knowing the Batfamily, and my little brother Damian.

She was going on and on about how he would tell her she loved him, and I gave her a death glare that she took to notice, but smirked and kept talking. I wanted to rip her throat out, but I was trying to stop killing, and I gave my eldest brother a warning glare when he took a step towards her.

But, my bearing did not stay in my control when we got to the cafeteria for lunch.

I was sitting with my pack and my dear brother at a table, well, I was walking towards them with a tray of my own, when Alya came up to me. I looked at her. "What do you want, Cesaire?" I spat, looking her in the eye.

The girl glared. "Don't be such a bitch, Mutt. I want you to stay away from Lila from now on, and stop bullying her!" She said. My blue eye twitched, and the room became silent.

"Well, I keep trying to go off and do my own thing, away from you wretched imbeciles, but your precious little liar over there keeps dragging me to wherever you are so that she can start shit. How about you do yourself a favor and leave me the fuck alone?" I growled lightly.

Alya growled. "Lila isn't a liar, so stop calling her that! You're the one bullying her because you're jealous of her-"

I cut her off and slammed my tray down in the empty table next to me. "Oh, for the love of God, can you PLEASE SHUT THE FUCK UP?! My god, how many times do I have to tell you? I DO NOT LOVE ADRIEN, and I'm NOT JEALOUS OF LILA. She is a LIAR, and she is DESTROYING your chance at becoming a reporter, Alya! She is feeding you and the class LIES to get what she wants! She does not care about you. She is manipulating all of you and spinning you into a spider web!" I yelled in exasperation. "Why can't you see that I'm trying to save you from what she is doing?! I'm trying to help you and save your future careers, but you still choose to believe the damn liar over the one that actually gives a shit about all of you. Open your eyes, Alya! I'm just trying to-"

I was silenced when I felt my head snap to the left, and something wet was trailing down my face.

Ow.

That hurt.

""SHUT UP! Lila isn't a liar, and she's a way better person than you, you bullying piece of shit! You're the one that's always hurting people. You're the one that was raised to be a killer, not her. Unlike you, Lila actually has a heart and cares about people, and you don't! You don't care about anyone except yourself, and I'm pretty sure that you don't have a heart in your body. Lila can express emotion, and you can't. Lila is more human, kind, sweet, and safe to be around, while all you do is lie, kill, manipulate, terrorize, bully, steal, harm, and bring death and pain to everyone that you are around. Lila is a perfect little innocent angel, and you're just a bloodshed loving psychotic demon. You always blame Lila for everything, and no one likes you. Your so called friends stay with you because they pity the fact that you will always be alone with no one to love them, and you're such a horrible person that even your parents left you. I bet your mentor was forced to try to take you back to Auschwitz where you belong. Your apparent brother probably doesn't even care about you either. I can't believe I was ever friends with a monster like you. Why don't you go jump off of one of the buildings here? I'm sure you'll find one tall enough for you. You'll be doing the entire globe a huge favor, and all the innocent people you heartlessly killed would be avenged and get the Justice they deserve. No one wants you here anyway." She said.

The whole room gasped, and I very slowly turned my head to look my former friend in the eye.

"...Fine." I said, then silently turned and left the building, my head down and tears streaming down my face, everything inside me shattered at what Alya had said to me.

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I was sitting in an empty but surprisingly clean old dumpster in an abandoned alley in the abandoned part of Gotham, my head buried in my knees and my body shaking as I cried my heart out in the tightest ball that I could force my skinny body to be in.

I'd been hiding from everyone all day, and now it was midnight and pitch black out, except for the full moon and the stars, but I didn't care.

Alya was right about everything she said, and I already knew, but it hurt as but as it did because she was the one saying it.

I WAS just a heartless murderer, and everything else she said.

I didn't understand why, but the entire city was looking for me, but they were probably looking for me to ensure that I was either dead or completely out of their city.

Everything in me was completely shattered, and I didn't think I was repairable.

To be honest, I didn't care.

My wrists were bloody from the recent deep cuts I added to them, and had lost a lot of blood, and I added more cuts to increase the amount of crimson liquid oozing from my arms, I had shot myself in the chest with all of the bullets I had as Red Renegade, stabbed myself until I couldn't feel anything anymore, and was listening to depression through a burner phone I had bought as loud as it could go, and I had used superglue to permanently shut the dumpster so that no one would ever be able to find me or open the metal cage to save me.

I wanted to be alone, and I didn't want to be saved by anyone. No one would care if I died anyway.

I had left the miraculous box and all of the miraculous and kwamis, especially Tikki and Plagg, in my hotel with a note to my pack, and I found myself wondering what Lila was doing, how she felt now that she had finally won the war between her and I.

I imagined her celebrating and choosing her next target, and the next victim suffering like I did.

Adrien was right when he said I should have taken the high road. Maybe then the war wouldn't have ended like this.

I felt defeated, worthless, pathetic, and unloved and unwanted. I felt like it was pointless for me to be breathing. I did bring pain and death wherever I went, and people always avoided me for who I was.

Even Slade hated me.

God, I was tired of living. I was tired of myself, and I didn't want to be alive anymore. I just wanted to be somewhere pain free, somewhere I could actually be happy, whatever that meant.

All of my senses were drastically getting weaker, and my heart was slowing at a rapid speed. My steel blue eyes slowly started to close, and I whispered one last thing before my entire body shut down.

"I'm sorry, my beloved twin. I am sorry."

And with that, everything faded and went black.

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