Kookie the Pet (BTS ft blackpink) 18 +

Chapter 6

Today

Nothing makes sense in Jungkook's head. Nothing makes sense for his caretakers. Aftercare from such a seemingly traumatic change doesn't seem to be helping, any more than the smell and comfort of a fresh diaper, so Yoongi and Jin have no choice but to get off Jungkook's bed and. .. simply. .. Stay in the room. 

Jungkook holds his knees tightly. His doe eyes can only stare ahead and process his peripheral vision as quickly as possible, there are no tears to be had anymore. 

And he wishes the same for everything else, only if there was no physical body to have, no physical presence, no thoughts, no feelings. He's been this way before, usually when he was sick and away from his parents or sick when Jin's not around. He's always good at being numb during the times where he's upset with big hit or hyungs, and he finds himself acting petty towards the people who are just trying to do their jobs… but when this happens, the phase is usually there to protect him, it's a barrier. To keep more things from happening and making him think badly of somebody. To help keep him from feeling the pain he really doesn't deserve to whine about. To keep something else from hurting him in the case where Jungkook could become what big hit calls a danger or a liability. Or in any petty situation to keep himself under control before he could become a bad son and a bad brother.

But here, now, damage has already been done, Jungkook has said too much and he has damaged the reputations and lives of a family, and particularly lives of people who were also stuck in a bad situation and were doing what they could for Jungkook. Or, really, maybe not, maybe Jungkook was just dumb and continues to be to this day, because he refuses to see anything other than everybody trying to help. And Jungkook wouldn't dare think it was for him, the legal team was there to serve people consequences that they may deserve, he started living with hyungs and gets visited by the other hyungs because he was too weak to protect himself, he can't depend on himself and he drags them into it instead of just keeping to himself. Jungkook's never wanted to hurt anybody. He can try to trust this legal team, he's willing to do it for those encouraging him. He knows he can trust the whole ensemble of BTS who are his family, he's willing to pull through for them. He can especially trust Namjoon, whose arm is around him rubbing his shoulder. And the best he can do is talk to Namjoon and give in to his questions because now Namjoon deserves to have a face full of relief and he deserves to know that he's done a good enough job for Jungkook to trust him. He's done more than enough, everybody's done too much. Like Jin, who is halfway on the bed and halfway on the floor, torn on whether he should stay to comfort Jungkook or go to start cooking food. Yoongi whose silhouette was going around the room with a remorseful face to discreetly inspect everything and tidy up a bit so that Hoseok won't get distracted when they come to visit later. Yes, the others will come bearing gifts for dinner just like with every visit. 

And all of this is because Jungkook can't say no. He hates to admit he likes this attention, it's a comfort. He's habitually entitled to baby treatment even if it's really not what he wants. He's just relying on the fact that Jin and Namjoon made arrangements then came to retrieve him. The fact that they wouldn't take no for an answer even if it means being hurt, being consumed, living Jungkook's trauma second-hand. His parents have taken no for an answer, even if it's through being blocked, blacklisted, being ignored, not being put on a list for visitation. Jungkook's had to choose between stealing himself away or giving them the pain of seeing him like this and hearing everything he has to say, Jungkook sure hopes he made the right choice. Jungkook hasn't blocked any of his work contacts, and he simply chooses to ignore the fact that he's definitely never going back to work, they're never going to accept him, his family is never going to let him, the public is going to be in even more pain upon seeing the results of all of this than they were with him being missing for so long, if that's even possible to say. At this point, Jungkook only exists to please, be retrieved, he's here only to submit, and this new family he's developed is pleased to have him, they're very easy to please and submit to, they have so many outlets and options for Jungkook to please and submit, and they are such good owners and caretakers to make him so comfortable. 

Namjoon is doing something to make Jungkook so comfortable with being close. Jungkook can't put a finger on it, and what helps is Jungkook actively avoiding the guilt he feels whenever he overanalyzes, judges, questions, denies Namjoon. Everyone has contributed something here, as a way to meticulously control and shelter Jungkook. Everyone's breathing is soft, Namjoon's voice is especially gentle. "What did you and them talk about while I was letting Yoongi inside?"

"Stuff."

"What stuff?"

"Things."

Across the room, Yoongi frowns and looks towards the door. Jin also, as they both silently agree to leave the room and give Jungkook space. 

Jungkook turns to watch them, then winces as his ankle monitor is snagged. His ankle is jerked tight. And not in the typical way, where he's bound including the ankles to, say, a bed or a chair. And not like having been rescued, bound in police custody then at the hospital for trying to get away. It's a specific tightness that can only come from one place, And, even with the collar gone, Jungkook can still feel the pulling, the leading.

Outside the room, Jin cracks the door open, naturally like the wind. He crouches to watch Jungkook. Meanwhile he holds the knob to keep it in place, and to have something to squeeze while he tries to cope with whatever he may be about to hear.

Yoongi grabs Jin's shoulder. Yoongi wants to scold him, but he would get shut down. 

Well… Besides, if it is Jin's business and it's about Jungkook, then it's Yoongi's business too. Yoongi also crouches down, but struggles to see over Jin's shoulder.

Namjoon asks Jungkook, "Did you tell the lady what I told you to?" He's about to address Jungkook's wince when he's cut off.

"No, I'm sorry. I'm sorry." Jungkook goes into a panic. Sorry, sorry, sorry like a broken record. Namjoon pulls him close, with a hand around Jungkook's cheek as he hushes him. 

Namjoon talks. It doesn't make sense but whatever comes out is an attempt to reassure Jungkook that it's okay. He's cut off again.

"I got to the part with the dinner. I wanted to tell what you said to say but there's more I didn't tell you and I thought I have to tell them first. I don't know how to say the…" And that's if Jungkook even knows how to organize his own thoughts in order to say anything.

Namjoon holds him tighter and tries to stay quiet so he'll talk. 

Jungkook goes cold. Soft like a doll.

Memories begin to flood again. 

The tightness on his neck. 

No… 

Namjoon can't stay quiet. "Talk about it." 

"After dinner, Richard… It was… They… No." 

Namjoon's demanding voice comes out. The tone Jungkook ever heard from him only in severe instances, but has been hearing a lot more recently. "Jungkook, tell me, now." 

Jungkook's head went down, out of habit and as desperate means of trying to hide from the sound of his own useless rambling and the reality of an emotional or even physical punishment for possibly implying the wrong thing about Sherry and her family. "They brought a- - It was- - No, they said- -" 

"Now." 

Jungkook has a habitual urge to submit. Like clay in the hands of interrogation, the information he has and his own words are Namjoon's property. 

"They told me to sit pretty… Like a good boy."