Love B.C

02

Dear Darling,

Today was your 1 year anniversary. It feeling like just yesterday I was crying into Minho's shoulder about it. I had not right to with how much of a coward I was but it still hurt. I always wondered if I ever hurt anyone when dating my ex, probably not.

When you gave each other gifts Hyunjin blocked my view, when he turned back to me with a sad smile it made me feel nauseous. I've seen everyones pitiful smiles since that day years ago, especially when you two do something couple-y. I do admit seeing you look at each other with such love and admiration did kinda hurt but I'm glad you can look at someone like that.

I'm making a plan to get over you. A plan to get over everything, all the struggles and hurt. I'm going to pull myself together and be like how people say I used to be. I don't really know who that me is, I don't even think it was the real me so might need to work that one out. All I need to do to start is actually make a plan.

Never mind making a plan was a terrible idea. Jisung says I should just "Go with the flow" but I don't think I should- that could end badly. I need to go to someone different for advice honestly.

I admit I did cry again today. After you left the others turned to me asking if I was okay, after like 10 minutes Jeongin just hugged me and I don't know what happened but I just cried. Why? I have not a clue. Sure it hurts seeing you like that but it seemed different today, some of the tears might of been because of you but the rest felt different like it was something else hurting me. Welp, life's weird.

Love B.C