Babysitting the Bad Boy's Little Sister

45

I'm stifled by my comforter over my face as I wake up suddenly. I check the time and lay back on the pillow. 2:45am. No texts from anyone. I feel like shit pretending like I don't care about where Sam is or what he's thinking about.

I roll over and stare at the wall for a while before deciding to get up and get some food. I tiptoe downstairs to find leftovers in the fridge, and I slump over the counter, forking at the cold pasta in the tupperware. What happened in the past day that went so wrong? I find myself slipping into sadness and have to snap myself out of it, blinking away the moisture in my eyes.

I clean up and head back to my room, shutting my door as quietly as possible before sitting at my desk to get some work done. I don't have too much homework, but I need a distraction. I check my phone once more and see nothing, so I slip my earbuds in and listen to some music to soothe my brain.

After I get my homework done and do some work for college applications, I am still agitated and decide I need a breather, so I head out to my car as quietly as possible. There's no school today, thankfully, and I head out of my neighborhood in no specific direction. Unfortunately, I find myself on Sam's side of town, and I cant keep myself from looking up to the house on the hill. My stomach drops when I see that a light is still on upstairs. Sam's room. It's 4:30am, what the hell is he still doing up? I decide to not risk being seen and drive past, feeling sick. The music goes quiet for a moment as I get a notification and it makes my stomach lurch.

Sam :O

hey

hey

I pull over and park, staring at the screen as the text bubble appears.

wanna come over

it's 4:30 in the morning

we need to talk
please

I sit on the idea for a moment as if I was going to say no, and agree to come over but sit in the car for about ten minutes, since it would be a little suspicious to show up so quickly. I drive back to his house and park in the driveway, getting out as quietly as possible as I see him walking down the porch stairs toward me.

"Uh, hey. Sorry if I was too loud, I don't know what you can hear inside-"

"It's fine. Don't worry about it," he approaches with determination in his voice and it makes me nervous.

"Okay. Um, what's up?" What is wrong with me?

"I kissed her. That's why I've been so distant. It wasn't supposed to happen and-"

"Kissed who?" This changes things. I feel that same sickness growing in my stomach again.

"Ella."

I'm rendered speechless, trying to process the situation. This is exactly what happened last time.

"Okay," is all I can say.

"Katie, I don't know what happened, seriously. It was so weird and we-"

"No explanation needed," I say quietly. Why does this keep happening to me?

"Kate, can we just talk about this?"

"What is there to talk about, Sam? After everything I told you, about something I really don't open up about, and you do exactly what he did. What are the odds of that?" I can't do anything but laugh at the situation if I want to keep myself composed around him. I feel myself backing away from him and to my car but he steps forward, grasping my hand.

"Do not touch me," I spit, harsher than intended. He retracts his hand and the look in his eyes breaks my heart.

"I'm sorry, Katie. I promise, it meant nothing. I know that doesn't justify anything, but please, I need you to believe me when I say that I am so sorry."

"When did it happen?" Suddenly I'm trying to figure out the time frame, when it really shouldn't matter to me. But in this moment, I need something to solve in my head.

"After I dropped you off the other night." He sounds more guilty than anything I've ever heard and I feel like I'm going to vomit.

"How... how did it happen?" I say quietly, unable to look at him.

"Katie-"

"Tell me."

"After I dropped you off, she invited me over. We got more drunk than we thought. It didn't go any further, though. I felt awful since the moment it happened."

"Don't spin this like you didn't do it. It didn't 'just happen.' Please don't treat me like an idiot."

"You know that's not what I meant."

"I can't believe that all the sweet talk... it just meant nothing."

"It does mean something-"

"Obviously it doesn't. I can't believe I'm here again. I'm gonna go," I whisper, on the verge of tears.

He stays quiet for a moment until I finally look up to him and he's staring at the sky.

"You can see the stars tonight," he mutters. I look up to see the most stars I've seen in the city probably ever.

"It's beautiful," I say, though I have now closed my eyes and am trying to squeeze the tears from my eyes.

"I think I love you," he says.

I furrow my brows and open my eyes to look at him.

"I just thought you should know," he looks me in my eyes before heading back toward his porch, leaving me speechless in his driveway, staring at the stars.

// omg uhhh ok idk what is happening in my brain but I am gonna try to grind out as many chapters as I can before I start struggling again so I can still upload. thx for sticking with me guys <3 luv u and hope u have a good day :)