The Black Rose Season

8

The following day, I fall asleep during a lecture, something I have never done in my over two years of being a student. But it's not my fault. I don't know how to sleep in that bed, in that room with Brendon fucking Urie, in that house full of Sigmas. I'm afraid that the Sigmas are going to rush in, screaming, "Traitor!" And if not that, I'm afraid I'll pop a boner in front of Brendon because he is filling my mind with all these rather lustful thoughts.

I woke up before Brendon did, sneaking out of the room to the toilets just a few doors down from us. Brendon slept like a baby, not that I stared or anything, of course not! More like... looked at him lying under the covers, hair all messy and lips in a pout, and hugging them as he slept peacefully. And I moved as quietly as I could and got dressed in the toilets, because I didn't want Brendon to wake up to see me in any stage of undress. After that, I gathered all the stuff I needed for the day and went downstairs for breakfast, where I was greeted with a way too cheerful Spencer and his roommate Sisky. The bright side was that at least I didn't have to make my own scrambled eggs.

But still, I am dying here. William does nothing to help as he talks of Sigma this and Sigma that, but William is on the top floor in a room of his own. He wouldn't understand that I can't just adjust to Sigma life the way he has. And it's William who pokes my side as I doze off in the middle of our lecture, "High Modernism and New Criticism."

We head back to the Sigma house just in time for lunch, and as I have no classes afterwards, I go to my room, or is it our room? In any case, Brendon isn't in.

I have a quick nap, falling asleep instantly. I conclude it's only Brendon's presence that makes it hard for me to sleep. After my quick nap, I start working but completely lose focus when I get a text message saying, "Don't forget, tonight at eight!" Of course. Tonight, I am having my first meeting, check up, whatever, with Pete. Fun...

I spend an hour writing in my diary and feel slightly better after it. It's like my therapist: I talk, it listens. I expect Brendon to come home after five, because his timetable by his desk indicates he finishes at five on Wednesdays. But Brendon doesn't show up, and I have a quick dinner with Sisky because us neos stick together or some shit. Sisky is way too maniacal for me, which, I suppose, makes him perfect for Spencer to spend time with.

"Spencer's an awesome roommate," Sisky beams dreamily, and I wonder if Spencer's gayness is rubbing off on Sisky. "You know what else?" Sisky asks me as he shoves pasta in his mouth.

"What?" I ask him, poking my own food with the fork. I prefer cooking my own food. Who knows what they've put in here?

Sisky lowers his voice slightly, leaning closer to me as we sit around the long table in the dining room. "I lost my virginity last night," he grins.

I freeze, because oh wow. Too much information, anyone?

I fake a smile and look at Sisky, who is obviously excited and proud. "Oh... um... congratulations?" I offer.

"Thanks, bro!" Sisky beams.

"It wasn't Spencer, was it?" I quickly add, suddenly seeing Spencer as a sex predator. I mean, Spencer totally would, wouldn't he?