actions speak louder than words {karlnap}

chapter 8

CW// angst 

(Karl POV)

They all sleepover. Just to try to spend as much time together as possible before I leave and Skeppy and George have their time soaked up by college. 

We lay my mattress and an extra mattress they have on Nick's floor. We stay up and talk -- well, I sign --  for an hour or so, but George is the one to say that we should get some sleep at around 1 am. I do need to get on a flight in just over 12 hours, so it's probably a good idea.

I crawl into Nick's bed as we all whisper our goodnights, with him holding up the blankets for me. My cheeks flush as I slip under his arm, my head resting on his pillow. The sheets land softly on my side as he drops them, enveloping us. I reach behind me to click off the light, and darkness consumes the room. 

I lift my hand and pat around until I find Nick's cheek. He giggles quietly, and I smile into the darkness. I feel his hand land on my arm before slowly moving up to the nape of my neck, leaving goosebumps in his wake. I feel him gently pull me forward, and I follow his movements. Even in the dark, my eyes flutter shut, and our lips touch, gently. And even though we've done this dozens of times before, I still feel poprocks in my stomach and see fireworks on my eyelids. 

"No having sex tonight, ya horny bastards," Dream says, voice muffled, probably by George's shoulder or the pillow or something. I pull away and bury my head in Nick's chest, trying not to laugh. 

I hear a thump, and Dream fails to muffle a yelp. "Language!" Bad hisses. 

"Shush, both of you!" Nick whisper-shouts. "Mom is sleeping."

We all giggle, except I muffle mine well. Another round of goodnights, and we're quiet. I roll over, facing the open room. Nick's arm loops over my middle, and he pulls me closer to him until my back is pressed against his chest. His breath comes hot on the back of my neck, and I feel his lips press against my skin. 

"I love you," he whispers, so quiet I'm not even sure he said it.

But I still whisper "I love you too" in return, just as quiet.

(Nick POV)

Goodbyes are the worst.

And they take forever. 

It's 23 minutes from the time when Bad first says they should all go to let us finish packing -- "finish 'packing'," Dream said, winking at me -- from when they actually leave. Karl is really upset to see them go, even after all the hugs and the "we'll miss you"s and the "I love you"s and the "have fun"s. As soon as he shuts the door behind them, he whirls around and buries his head in the crook between my neck and shoulder. 

"I don't wanna leave," he whispers. "I was always excited for university, because I would apply to somewhere as far as I could, still within limit, so I could get away from everyone. Now I just want to stay here, with you and our friends."

I wrap my arms around him and sway us back and forth. "You'll be okay, Karl," I reply quietly. "We're not going anywhere. We'll text every night and FaceTime and call as often as possible. I'll still love you, and our friends will too. Nothing will change."

That seems to work, because he doesn't argue back. 

~~

The car ride to the airport is dense with silence. I'm used to silence, but not this kind. This kind if sad, lonely, upset, and even slightly angry. 

Neither of us want to arrive. It's obvious. But it's not like Karl can get his money back, so he has no choice. No matter how much he wants to stay. 

It's just four months has become my mantra. Sure, four months -- oh, that'll pass easily! It's no time at all! Except when your boyfriend is virtually across the country. Then molasses might pass faster.