THE MASKED GIRL

29

Hafsat

I don't know how many days I had spent here while I was unconscious but I know two days have passed since I woke up. I refused to eat anything he served me, I wouldn't risk letting him take advantage of me. He only untied me thrice a day to use the bathroom, a bathroom with no window. The bed is the only item inside the room and I'm tied to it, I do nothing but stare at the room memorizing every part of it. I have already mastered the number of the visible tiles in the room, the number of the ceiling boxes, and the design of the standing fan. I am very sure that wherever it is that I am at is a secluded area because there is no sign of any living thing apart from me and him, there is no clock for me to tell the time or know whether it is morning, evening or night.

He had tried to get his way with me as if I would ever let him he then tried to force me to eat which I also turned down even though I was starving, I rather die of hunger than let him drug me and find his way with me.

I was hysterically drained, scared, and exhausted. There was no sign of people so I didn't bother to shout for help but I tried to escape. I waited until he uncuffed me and I got into the bathroom, I stayed in there for hours waiting for him to get tired and leave the room and I eventually heard him go out. I tiptoed out of the room opening the door quietly not to make a sound, I got into another room which I think is the living room because of a couch and table that were inside. I peeped before going out through the one door that leads outside the sunlight almost blinding my eyes I looked around and saw him sitting on the trunk of the only car which I assumed was his facing the other side.

The house is located in the middle of nowhere there was nothing around but trees and the road looked like an abandoned unpaved road. I will be better off in the forest than being locked up. I stepped out cautiously and took slow steps backward getting away from the house and its surroundings. Was it the branch of the tree that made me fall making a sound or my bad luck that made him turn around? I don't know I just find myself running for my life.

I was too tired and dying of thirst and hunger but I continued running. I skipped through the forest not knowing where I was headed, I ran for so long that I thought my legs would fall off with how my knees were aching. I turned around to see whether he was still following me only to collide with a tree sending me straight into unconsciousness.

I never questioned how unfortunate I was for getting kidnapped until I woke up to find myself tied again, I felt like taking my life to get out of the misery. I had been locked up for god knows how many days but I knew I had been here for three days without food and saying any prayer. I cried, I shed tears for the first time since I was kidnapped. I wept uncontrollably knowing that my life was doomed no one would be able to find me in this forsaken place and the key to my freedom was something I rather die than accept, I would never let him have sex with me. Maybe this was my life after all, to die out of misery and my dead body thrown somewhere by him.

Maybe my sobs were what told him that I was awake when the door was flung open and he angrily stormed in. "How dare you to try escaping?" He walked straight towards me and slapped me hard across the face, twice. My hands were tied and I was the victim Obviously there was nothing I could do. "Come in" He commanded as he walked away from the bed to the door and his three friends walked in.

My heart stopped beating for a second, the thought of what might happen struck terror into me. "I wanted to wait until you agree" He started speaking as he gave an order to his friends pointing towards me with his eyes. "But I cannot risk you escaping again"

The three take dangerously slow steps toward me each step fills my soul with more fear. I started begging for help immediately one of them held me and the two forcefully ripped up every piece of clothing I had on despite all my squirming and screams. My body was completely exposed to eight lustful eyes. My hands which were already tied were tightened on the bed but I didn't stop fighting for freedom and pleading for their mercy.

"I have to record this and see how her boyfriend will react after seeing it" His closest friend whose name I don't know spoke as he brought his phone out and started recording.

"You were stubborn and never going to cooperate" He unzipped his jeans as he spoke and got onto the bed, one of the two unoccupied friend pressed my arms on the mattress and the other did the same to my legs as they made way for him. I was manhandled by them. The hope of being saved sinks into the thin area and replaces it with another feeling. Fear.

The realization of what was about to happen made me freeze. My whole body went numb and I couldn't do anything but watch. I never thought I could be raped. Tears flow freely on my face.

I watched his hands roam around my body, touching places no one has ever had. His hand, mouth, and tongue fiddled with my body like a toy. I watched him grope my chest down to my lower stomach and down to the place that held my pride. I couldn't stop him. I watched as he did his job. He fell deaf ears to my pleas and forcefully thrust himself into me, an experience that will forever kill me. I watched him ruin me.

My life. My virtue. My purity. My honor. My dignity. My security. My virginity. My pride.

He took everything from me for his one time pleasure.

I thought that was just it when he was done but they took turns, they took turns in raping me. I was gang raped. My whole life was ruined in five hours. Killing me would have been better.

How could this happen to me? This cannot be real. I told myself it was not real. But the fire I feel radiating through my thighs, the nauseating pain-this bulletlike thing that ripped through me and got lodged in my gut tells me otherwise.

Four men ruined my life. Not once, not twice. There was a pain in my heart. Pain in my body. Pain in me. I was pain. My cries, my pleas, and my shouts didn't save me. I couldn't save myself. I couldn't stop them. They had their way with me. I was left in blood, a pool of my own blood. I was a mess. A mess of four men. I was just eighteen.

Anger. Shame. Guilt. Hatred. Disbelief. Those were the only emotions I felt, how could this happen to me? Death would be the safest thing for me If only I could take my own life.