Debauched || Namjoon

Used.

~ ❦ ~

I turned off my blow dryer and looked at myself in my mirror.

There I catch a glimpse at my neck. I placed my hand over my damp skin, my fingers brushing through the dark hickey Namjoon had made to cover the one that Yoongi's brother had made.

The situation was so weird when I left the party, and I already know when we talk it's gonna be even weirder.

Fortunately I'm skipping today so I won't have to deal with that till tomorrow.

Just then, my door abruptly swung open and shut in quick succession. My head turned simultaneously in accordance to the sound and my eyes didn't hesitate to meet with him. There Namjoon was with a towel on his head, in the middle of ruffling his wet hair as he walked in my direction.

As he walked closer I could see a smile on his face as he noticed my hair. I decided to leave it curly today.

"Hey" Heard a tentative voice say as he walked further to me.

My eye's focus on his chest glistening from the shower he had just taken. "Hey" I crane my neck up to look up to meet his gaze as he looks down at me from his position.

"How did you sleep?"

"Umm.. I slept-" I paused for a second to think about last night. I didn't sleep. Even with Namjoon being near me and holding me all night I just couldn't bring myself to comfortably sleep. "I slept okay, how about you?"

He grinned a little. "I dreamt about you so of course it was amazing"

I don't respond and just smile. It grew quiet between the two of us as his hand went up my face to gently caress the side of my cheek and clear some loose strands of hair. My eyes escaped from his as I took a glance at my door feeling just a bit paranoid of the events that happened last night.

Namjoon leans in close, his lips just inches away from mine. "Where is she?" I asked just before he was about to kiss me.

"She left for her obgyn appointment" He whispered against my lips.

"And you didn't go with her?"

"Why would I?" He asks genuinely as if it would be so weird if he had gone with her.

His nose brushed against mine as he moved his head forwards making our lips suddenly connect in a sort of surprise. My hands instinctively reached up to his chest to push him back. "What's wrong baby?" He muttered in a shallow breath as his brows furrowed in confusion. I turned my head at the door and a quick flashback of last night entered my mind.

"I locked the door," Namjoon tried to reassure me and it worked. I felt slightly less paranoid. I keep quiet when turning back, my eyes focus on him as I lick the bottom of my lip.

The hand on my cheek slipped behind my head, I felt Namjoon take a fist full of my hair, gentle. The fear in my eyes was just too much for him as he pulled me in for a kiss that he had waited for what felt like an eternity. The light touch of his lips felt nice and yet at the same time I found myself still, holding my breath as I waited for his lead.

I waited and waited until eventually disrupting the kiss, and pulling away with a sigh. "Something is obviously bothering you, tell me"

He pressed his forehead against mine as he waited for me patiently to answer and couldn't help but feel like a deer trapped in the oncoming headlights of a truck.

"Umm.. I just f-... I just feel-"

"You feel what?" He interrupted the fumbling of my words.

I inhaled and exhaled to try to gather myself to let out a coherent sentence. "I never thought that my actions would cause so much trouble and pain for my own mother" My upper lip quivered a little. "All night I just kept thinking about how angry she was, how much she probably despises me and I just feel so guilty"