MONDAY May 18, 2020
Quarantine fatigue getting to me. Too anti-social for social media, but decide to join Nextdoor, social media site for neighborhoods. Huh. Seems like every other post is wondering why helicopters are overhead. Jeez, people, it's just a helicopter. Chill! My neighbors are so paranoid!
TUESDAY May 19, 2020
Go for walk. Hear helicopter circling overhead. OMG! It must be chasing an escaped convict! Just then, man runs toward me on trail... it's the convict! Hop into defensive stance and put up my fists. He screeches to halt, turns around, and runs the other way. Hey, karate is good for something!
WEDNESDAY May 20, 2020
On Nextdoor, see that someone else saw the escaped convict yesterday, and was threatened by him! Glad I scared him off! Huh. Apparently convict had purple shoes. I have purple shoes! What are the odds?
THURSDAY May 21, 2020
Hair clippers arrive! Can finally trim this shaggy mane. Study YouTube videos to learn proper buzzing technique. Set everything up in bathroom, pick up clippers, and [bleep]! Have to take off my glasses and now can't see a [bleep] thing. Here goes anyway. Later: I guess I will wear a hat for awhile. Maybe Jules can fix it when she gets back.
FRIDAY May 22, 2020
Was flossing teeth and knocked some tartar loose. Realized, not only can I cut my own hair, I can clean my own teeth! Easily picked off the rest with a thumbnail. Who needs dentists?
SATURDAY May 23, 2020
Everyone on freeway going at least 75. Guess the speed limit got changed, but the signs haven't been updated yet. Notice people alone in cars, wearing masks. Now, that's paranoid!
SUNDAY May 24, 2020
One of the resident cats is now regularly pooping at bottom of stairs. Gross! Are they acting up from quarantine fatigue? But wait, their whole lives are spent in "quarantine," so what's the problem?
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OMG: A Journal of the Pandemic Year(s)
HumorIt's 2020 and the pandemic has hit! OMG! If you're reading this, you've survived. So far. Now you need a laugh, or two, or seventeen. You need OMG. Join our hapless hero as she copes with the global impact of COFEVE-19, faces off monoliths and the T...
