Transfer to Help Himself

Chapter 16- Flashbacks

TW// Mentions of abuse

"You let go!"

"You're doing it, Evan!"

"I'm doing it. I'm actually doing it!"

"Evan watch out!"

"Maddie, what is going on? Where did you get that bike?!"

"I found it in the garage..."

"Evan, Maddie, go inside. Now."

Margaret Buckley was sobbing. "I thought you got rid of all of his stuff, Phillip. Why is his bike still here?" A red bike with the name 'Daniel' on the back was lying in the road. "I couldn't let him go. I thought we could save the memories". Phillip hugged his wife. "That defective boy must have pressured our precious Maddie to let him ride it. He must be taunting us." Margaret cried out. Phillip agreed and headed inside, walking up the stairs and straight to Buck's room. Buck was sitting on his bed, knees scraped and head in his arms, silently crying. "Evan...Listen, you can't manipulate your sister to let you do these dangerous things. You got hurt because you wanted to ride the bike. I'll help you dress it, but you are grounded for one week," Phillip quietly said.

"Yes sir."

Buck was climbing the tree. His mother always told him not to, but he wanted to get away from the yelling. Maddie and their father were arguing about Buck's punishment and how Maddie was the one with the idea to allow Buck to ride the bike. He reached one of the top branches and sat down. He brought a book out with him. It was a Goosebumps book. Buck had hyperfixiated on the series last year and Maddie had bought him most of the books that were out. This one was 'Calling All The Creeps', his favourite. He was out there for almost an hour before his mother came out. "Evan Buckley! How many times have I told you NOT to climb the tree?! Get down here this instant or I will get your father!"

Buck dropped his book from the venom in his mother's voice. "Evan, get down now!" He started to climb down, but one of the branches he was holding on to, broke and brought him down with it. Buck felt a snap in his arm, accompanied by a blazing pain. He didn't cry out, though. He knew not to. Maddie heard the commotion and ran outside, pushing their mother out of the way. "Oh my God, Evan. What happened? Are you ok? Is anything broken?!"

Buck tried lifting his arm but let out a little whimper when he couldn't. He didn't need to look down to know that he had broken his arm. "Jeez, I don't think arms are supposed to bend that way, Ev. I'll take you to the hospital. Come on". This snapped Margaret out of her stupor. "You will do no such thing, Maddie. His father can patch him up. Just take Evan to his room and stay in yours. I'm going to grab Phillip," Margaret hissed. Buck was scared. His father would do much worse than a broken arm because Buck broke a rule.

Maddie left. She left and married Doug. She left Buck with their parents. All so she could get out. He was stuck. He was stuck with the punishments. His parents blamed him for their precious daughter leaving so soon. Buck needed to get out for the night. So, he left. And bought a motorcycle. A beautiful red motorcycle that allowed Buck to feel free. He rode that bike everywhere. And then he started college. There, he went wild. He started going to parties with his roommate, drinking and sneaking around with men and women alike. He was 'exploring his sexuality', as one of his partners had said. He got into a nice poly relationship with two other people in his class. But nothing was meant to last. His roommate left and his partners decided that three was a crowd. He got kicked out because his grades were too low. So, he drove. And drove. And drove. Until his wheel gave out on him, and he crashed the motorcycle.

The hospital he went to was Maddie's. He had asked for her specifically and wouldn't leave until she came. He explained what happened and asked to move in with her and Doug, but Maddie rejected him quickly. "He's hurting you, isn't he? Why wouldn't you tell me, Mads? We were supposed to protect each other..."

"I don't need your protection, Evan. Now go home. Mom and dad will be worried". Buck scoffed before fear overtook him. "God, Mads. They're going to kill me. I was kicked out of college. That was the only reason they still supported me. Please. I don't care. Just leave with me." Maddie sighed. "I can't. I have a life here. This is where my job is. Now go."

They were yelling and shouting slurs at him. His school had already called them, and his ex-partners had shown up to apologise, unintentionally outing Buck as they did. His father had hit him and his mother slapped him. That's when Maddie pulled up and Buck ran out. Leaving his childhood behind. Maddie had stopped a few streets over and gave Buck her keys. "I'm not going with you. I can't leave Doug. I can't leave mom and dad. So, go. I don't care where. Just get away from here."

Buck was heartbroken. His sister didn't care how Buck felt. She was sending him off with no way for him to contact her. But he left, too afraid to stay. He sent Maddie postcards of his travels. He even sent her a picture of one of his boyfriends and told her he was bisexual. She, at the time, supported him and his many partners. Then there was no contact for a while when he was in L.A. until she showed up in his ex's apartment. She had run away from her abusive husband. Buck supported her and never left her alone. He never gave up when Doug kidnapped Maddie. He stayed by her side when she was recovering.

And then Freddie blew up the truck. Buck had woken up alone in the hospital, the only visitors he would ever see were Eddie and Athena. Maddie only came to help him when Ali left. Maddie tried to get him to quit trying to go back to the 118. She tried getting him to take a safer job, but Buck was nothing without being a firefighter. So, Maddie cut off all contact with him again. Just like she always did.

Buck was recertified not that much later, and Maddie brought him to Bobby and Athena's to celebrate. The horrified look she gave him when he coughed up blood. Maddie then tried to make him quit again. She even told Bobby that Buck wasn't ready and Bobby agreed. She felt like she had won. And then Bobby caved and told Buck that he was the one holding Buck back. Maddie didn't answer when Buck called her. She ignored all of the calls and text messages. Then Chimney broke up with her when Buck left, and she texted him. She was angry at him for ruining the one good thing in her life. And the trial didn't help. She wasn't sorry about telling Buck about Daniel. And she wasn't lying when she threatened to call their parents. When she got her phone call, that's who she called. Buck would know to never mess with Maddie Buckley.