Unfunny Tfp Oneshots/Bloopers

Miko does Music

*SMASH*
Bulkhead yelped as he toppled sideways into Bumblebee. Bumblebee, in turn, let out a screeching;
"BEEEEEEEEEEP!"
Bulkhead winced as he rolled off the smaller bot. Usually, when Bumblebees words didn't translate for him it meant the Scout was either screaming or so angry he didn't bother to form words.
"Sorry Bee, you 'lright?"
Bumblebee stood up with a childish glare and crossed his arms over his chassis.
"I didn't see you!" Bulkhead tried to reason. (unsuccessfully)
Bumblebee was about to shoot back an insult when Ratchet opened the groundbridge.

Both bots spun quickly to goggle at Optimus and Arcee, the pair that was sent to inspect an old mine. Normally they would have all gone, but they'd recently discovered that a lot of the mines that humans had dug were for coal. These didn't have any energon in it, so the team sent out groups of two or three to investigate whether the mine is useful or not.
Smokescreen sped into the room excitedly just before Optimus and Arcee entered. He was buzzing with energy, like always.
Bumblebee moved to stand by him instead and Bulkhead cringed.
Heavy pedesteps caught their attention just before Bulkhead was going to say something he would regret.
They all looked towards Optimus, who was walking towards the team with a strangely shaped wooden structure in his servos.

Arcee followed behind him, carrying a stool that had been stained black by what the bots presumed to be Coal Dust. The structure was coated with it as well, the dirty particles slowly drifting off the surface and onto the floor.

Fowler wasn't going to be happy.

The Coal Dust coating everything- including Optimus and Arcee- answered the question of if the mine was Energon or not. However, the random structure Optimus was carrying was too interesting to ignore.

"What is it?" Bumblebee asked, running over to the Prime and tapping the structure. It wasn't very big to Cybertronians, but would be quite large to the humans that the Autobots liked to keep company.
"It is what humans call a Piano." Optimus stated simply, Ratchet snorted loudly and they turned to look at him in shock.
"What? Music! Optimus just brought in a way to make noise! Isn't having Miko here enough?"

Bulkhead rolled his Optics and looked back; Ratchet never seemed to stop being mean about his charge. Although, he did see the two having a normal conversation the other day. The thought of it weirded him out.

"What's a Piano?" Smokescreen interrupted, still buzzing with energy.
Arcee set the stool down in the Human Area and stretched.
"It's a way to make music, you press the keys and it creates a sound."
Arcee's explanation wasn't very enlightening. She sighed and lifted up a slab of wood on the Piano, revealing at least 100 white rectangles and loads of black ones. Bulkhead observed that the black ones were skinnier and raised above the white ones.
Arcee carefully pressed down on a white rectangle and a clear sound echoed from the piano.
"BEEEP!" Bumblebee made another squealing noise, although Bulkhead felt that this time he was excited rather than annoyed.
"Oh Mikos gonna lo-" Bulkhead paused and looked around wildly for a clock- despite not knowing how to read one yet. He had, however, memorised the time he had to pick Miko up from school and what time he had to bring her back home.
"What time is it?" He asked Ratchet. Ratchet groaned;
"I was hoping you wouldn't notice and I'd have a day without those blasted kids!"

Bumblebee groaned and transformed, followed by Bulkhead and Smokescreen. They were already 10 minutes late.

--
Raf, Miko, and Jack were all sat on a brick wall, waiting. Vince had already been picked up five minutes earlier, and he had spent about twenty minutes after school terrorising Raf.
Said boy was currently drenched in water from Vince's bottle. Luckily, it was a decent day so he was drying off. Jack had his arm around Raf, despite the dampness that now ran down his shirt.
Miko was hanging upside down from the bike racks.

"Primus Miko, can you stop that? This isn't a playground!"
"So what? C'mon Jack Rabbit!"
Jack groaned at the nickname and ignored her again. Frankly, he was more worried about the bots: them being late usually meant that something was wrong or that they were battling to the death.
Three engines came into hearing distance almost as soon as Jack thought this.
All three kids looked up and relaxed once they saw their alien friends approaching.
Smokescreen was first, he skidded to a stop and shouted;
"Jack: Please enter!"
Jack sighed and jumped off the wall. Miko had already sprinted -and cannonballed- into Bulkheads front seat. As Smokescreen shut the door, Bumblebee could be heard talking to Raf. Probably about the drenched state of the boy.

"What are you so late for then?" Jack asked once they left the school and hit the road.
"Oohohoo!" Smokescreen whooped, which wasn't really an answer.
"...well?" Jack questioned.
"Optimus Prime and Arcee found something!"
Jack raised an eyebrow and went back to staring out the window. He had a headache and couldn't be bothered to deal with Smokescreens evasive tactics.

---
Bumblebee kept ranting to Raf about how much he hated Vince. Raf sighed, the heaters were blasting in his face and he hadn't even had a chance to get a word in edgeways.
"Bee?"
"I hate that good for nothing, stupid, little-"
"BEE!"
Bumblebee stopped speaking, suprised that Raf had yelled.
"I'm fine! It's just water!"
Bumblebee made a strange noise with his windows, which Raf took to be bashfulness.
"Whatever Bee. What took you so long?"
Bumblebee didn't answer for a few seconds, then simply said;
"Found a Piano."
Raf didn't know whether to be excited or not. He'd had Piano lessons when he was younger, but he was never all that good at it.
"Oh, cool."
The rest of the ride was awkward, with Bumblebee obviously upset about Vince and then Raf yelling.
Raf was almost relieved when he was placed into the human area.
Jack had gotten there before him and was sat at the piano already. The piano actually looked to be in perfect condition!
Jack was experimentally pressing keys, pausing after each one. Raf walked up beside him and joined in.

"Can you play?" Jack asked.
Raf thought for a few seconds.
"Not well."
"Show me?"
Jack got up and Raf sat down, his feet barely touching the pedals.
Raf quickly played a fast version of Für Elise. Jack was evidently impressed, despite how easy the song was. Feeling a bit more confident, Raf began to play a song he used to like, 'You Give Love a Bad Name'.
He didn't know all of it, but liked it nonetheless. Jack was clearly enjoying the show, until Miko came in. She looked strangely embarrassed at the piano.

"Hey Miko! Can you play anything?" Jack asked. He didn't expect her to be able to, she was so much of a guitarist person. Surprisingly, she nodded meekly. Raf took the opportunity to get up and stop playing the song, as he kept playing the wrong notes.
Miko sat down awkwardly and froze.
"Well?" Jack asked.
"Dunno what to play." Miko said.
"Uhhh, play The Black Parade!" Raf listed a song he heard Miko listening to constantly a few days ago.
Miko seemed to flinch at the name but started to play regardless. To say she was good was an understatement.
The music was amazing.
Very amazing.

When she was done, The kids and the bots watching clapped. Miko went bright red and mumbled something.
"What?" Bulkhead asked.
"I made a song up a few weeks ago..." Miko said, Jack and Raf were concerned at how shy she was being.
"Play it!" Smokescreen yelled, ignoring Ratchets growl of annoyance.

Miko nodded and turned around again,
"I made it up because you guys are really awesome and I wanted to give you a theme tune. So, yeah."
She quickly began to play, and everyone was amazed.
It really did fit their lives. And it sounded awesome.
Miko was playing for a good three minutes before she stopped, flushing red. Everyone stood in shocked silence for a few seconds before breaking out into applause.

"That was... actually good?" Ratchet said, suprised.
At that, the bots broke into laughter. Miko grinned through her red face.
"What are you calling it?"
"Well, it's unoriginal... but I called it the Transformers: Prime Main Theme!"

The piano version of the theme is linked above!