Chapter Twelve

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Night descends on the land, illuminating the community in pale moonlight. Wind whispers softly in a lullaby, carrying with it the lingering scent of dinner shortly before: crisp charcoal from grilled cattle and the sweetness of apples and cinnamon from the baked dessert offered. Ella tucks her arms against her chest to shield the bare skin from the chill that comes with the wind, inhaling deeply at the calming atmosphere. Her conversation with Nick had worked to relieve the pressure of concern caging her heart, shushing the irrational whirlwind of anxiety.

Now, Ella sits hidden in her corner of the world, eyes fixated on the twinkling sky. The vastness is comforting; all the stars spread across the bleak darkness, existing as one piece of a whole. It reminds her of the ranch: each person a single being, but part of something big and wonderful. When her father died, she had searched for purpose and reason within this same sky. Both her parents had left her here among strangers who looked after her and cared for her when she was alone. Troy was her biggest supporter over all. Countless nights shielded by this same berry bush where Troy sat next to her in silence, pretending to understand her fascination with the stars. The same spot where he watched her crumble under her own fears, kissed away the tears in an unexpected and somehow perfect surprise. Under those beautiful stars, Ella had realized her purpose is Broke Jaw Ranch and her reason was Troy Otto himself.

It's this familiar place that Troy knows she will be when her cabin is empty. Like the past, Troy sneaks beside her, dropping himself to the ground with his legs stretched in front of him and his palms steady on the drying grass. The fingertips of the hand between their bodies brushes against her thigh delicately as an alert to his intrusion despite her head having lifted slightly when he joined. His eyes - one swollen and bruised, the other clear - focus on the sky above him. Countless nights between them were spent here, some completely silent and others filled with the hushed whispers of two teenagers broken in ways that seemed to fit together like one complex puzzle.

He's contemplating what to say to the girl, mind wandering to her and Nick standing in the blazing afternoon sun. Curiosity was an aggressive beast begging to bare its teeth and demand to know what they were doing together, but he slams the cage shut - imprisons it to the back of his mind. He trusts Ella. It was Nick he was wary of. Ella was the sun Nick was simply flying too close to.

Troy didn't expect the boy to keep her secret from his mother. The whole family seemed to hate him and everything he stood for. There was nothing he cared for more than the medic. He's grimly reminded of the fact the Clarks knew of this, learning days before under the expectation of a boar hunt. "If I noticed," Nick had scoffed that night, huffing from the ground after their scuffle had ended. "My mom sure as hell did."

Troy didn't want to leave her with the two remaining Clarks - two potential threats. He couldn't take her with him, either. It looked like he wouldn't win no matter the choice he makes, so he goes with the sensible one: Ella at Broke Jaw with Madison's kids. He can only hope the remaining ranchers will look out for her in his absence.

"You're out late," Ella finally greets, bringing her knees upward so she can rest her cheek against them, uncomfortably looking at him in her curled spot. It's a pleasant surprise, but it does make her curious. Typically, he rests before missions to assure peak performance. Not that she isn't happy to see him...she always is.

"So are you," He responds, head tilting sideways to gaze at her from the corner of his good eye. He pushes himself upward, wrestling the jacket off his shoulders to place carefully on the hunched girl before returning to his original state. She moves to slip her arms in the sleeves, embraced by the fabric still warm from his body as she straightens to a proper sitting position.

"I couldn't sleep. You're leaving tomorrow."

Troy's heart swells with something both painful and pleasant all at once as he sighs. She was sweet to him without warning and he couldn't catch a break from it. Of all the people on the ranch, Ella Phillips was the only one who bothered caring whether he was gone or not. Maybe what he felt was love, but he never had or saw it growing up so he couldn't know. Not that Ella had any experience, either. He was the burdensome child locked away from crying for attention and she was the one abandoned in every way possible - willing and unwilling. They were two products of circumstance that fit together. She gave him the attention and care he never got when he was a child and he gave her the certainty that he would be there no matter what.

"I won't be gone for long." He speaks quietly, hoping to reassure her. Two days at most; the outpost wasn't far. Still, he sees the frown pulling her lips downward. He wants to pin them into the relentless smile with his own, but refrains.

"Last time you said that, you came back hurt."

Ella knows Troy will fight tooth and nail to return to her, but she also knows how reckless he can become with the monster's roars echoing in the back of his head. Tamed by the gift of bashful caresses and meek but certain brushes of lips, the beast would burn the whole world to the ground just to see her again.

"I'm not going to leave you," Troy promises. Instead of comforting her, it sparks a kindling of fear in her stomach so strong it makes her nauseous. She wants to tell him that's exactly what he's doing: prancing into a world she hadn't seen in years, apocalyptic or otherwise. He'll drive through the gate with a careless wave and teeth gleaming in a boyish, excited smile and she'll stand watch until she no longer sees the vehicle, wondering if it's the last time she'll see him.

It's silly to be so fearful of something that seemed so unlikely, but she's reminded of her father and how invincible he seemed to be. Trent Phillips was strong and spirited. He took joy in playing chicken with aggressive cattle, cheering so loudly his voice echoed throughout the ranch. He was out every day causing trouble, giving Charlene pointers on how to terrorize 'Troy and his Merry Men'. Unlike Jeremiah, Trent was present and involved, clapping Troy on the shoulder when he did something his dad didn't quite agree with. He was a rough man with affectionate tendencies, helping to build up the youth of Broke Jaw without intention. His death was quiet and sudden; a brutal awakening for her at 16. She woke up one awful morning to the man who constantly flitted in every direction still and silent - and then she was alone.

If only Ella could be selfish and ask him to stay with her instead of chasing some childish wish for his father's love and approval. But she knows he had to go. Their people are out there in oblivion; a weird purgatory of alive and dead all at once. Troy had to find them and bring them home whatever way he could.

Quirking her mouth into an uneasy, lopsided smile, she nods. The simple action leaves him unsatisfied, wanting more than that. Too many times has she granted him gentle kisses of reassurance and comfort, but now offers nothing. Her unease makes him anxious even though he doesn't mention it. Instead, her fingers brush softly against the top of his hand, goosebumps rising on his arms at the light touch.

"Nick and Alicia agreed not to tell Madison about me."

The happiness in her voice relieves him slightly. More than anything, he finds himself suddenly comforted and less worried about what his absence meant for her. His grin shows his teeth as he leans forward, two smiles melted into one. In this moment, it was just Troy and Ella in the world; a beautiful, complex constellation reflecting the stars above.

At least, it was until the smoke billowed into the air, shouts echoing in the distance. Peace is abandoned for an uproar.

Unedited.

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⏰ Ultimo aggiornamento: Dec 31, 2022 ⏰

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