Counting Paths

Chapter 32.

Russell almost hits Kevin with the car, but at the last second, he swerves out of the way and stomps on the barks, roughly a hundred feet from the destroyed Jeep. "Is he fucking insane?!" Russell shouts. I kick my door open, get out of the car, and stomp over to where Kevin is sitting in the middle of the road. "Roland, don't!"

I snatch Kevin by his shirt and pull him to his knees. His eyes are red with tears, his nose is broken with a nasty cut opening it, and there's dry blood covering the lower half of his face, the fucking asshole looks beaten up, but it only feeds my anger. If he looks so shitty, what the hell does Sterling look like?

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" I ask him in a trembling voice.

"I couldn't get to her. I'm so sorry!"

"Roland, let him go!" Russell shouts behind me. "This isn't his fault!"

Just then, three cars pull up on my right. I release Kevin, and he falls to the ground like a bag of rocks. I recognize the cars as the cars I bought for my guys. I knew Russell called a few of the guys but I didn't think they would come here. Frank climbs out of the first car and sprints over to Kevin and me. "We're ready for whatever you want to do."

"He's not alone," Kevin states as he forces himself to sit up. "I could probably make out a dozen men with him. They had a van and two cars."

"We can't do anything," Russell cuts in, joining us. I glare at him and he holds up a hand. "What I meant is we can't do anything because we don't know anything. We don't know where he is, where he might've taken her, or how many men he has in total. He could've taken Sterling back to her mother's and be baiting us right now-"

"He has Sterling!" I shout. "Of course he's going to use her to bait us!"

"But if she's with her mother, then there's nothing much to truly worry about. This is my point, we know nothing! There are so many possibilities where Sterling could be perfectly fine. Safe and unharmed."

"And if she's not?"

"Thinking the worse would only fuck you up even more and we'll never find her." He turns his attention to Frank. "Get all the information you can on James Tide Wilson. We'll regroup at the warehouse."

"No!" I crack my knuckles and drag my hand down the length of my face. "Go with Frank. I'll call Smith and get Kevin back to the house to get him checked out."

"Are you sure?" Russell asks me.

I shudder and remind myself to breathe. As much as I hate to admit it, Russell's right. Allowing my anger to take over won't help Sterling. I need to collect myself and try to focus. "I can...I can do this," I say in a not-very-convincing voice. "You're in charge at the warehouse. Call me when you learn anything useful."

He nods firmly. "Yes, sir."

He helps me get Kevin in the backseat of the car, then we part ways. I get in the driver's seat...and take deep breaths as everyone else drives off in their cars.

"Can you drive?" Kevin groans.

"I can drive." I grab the wheel with shaky hands.

"We don't have to go to the house. I can go to the hospital. Just drop me off-"

"Here." I toss my phone over my shoulder. "Call Smith and tell her to hurry."

# # #

Why do I think I can handle going to the house and seeing Sterling's shit after everything? I don't know, but I can. I've been away for so long, the horrifying truth of her being kidnapped still doesn't feel real. I keep thinking she's about to come rushing in from around the corner and yell at me excitedly or angrily, whichever one didn't matter because she would be there. But she doesn't come barging in. She isn't here. The house is empty, Moose is still lying at the bay window, hasn't moved an inch since we left like she knew this entire time what happened, and Sterling's stuff scattered everywhere physically hurts me.