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I was sitting out on the beach, watching the waves when I heard the sand shift beside me.
"Hey." Looking over, I see him. He looks tired. "Hi... How'd it go?" "We uh, we convinced her to do treatments." "That's great Connie, really." I give him a weak smile.
"What's wrong?" You know the usual relationship doubts, that are currently irrelevant because your mom is sick.
"Nothing." I shake my head. "Star." Deflect. I'm good at that. "...It's just that...Tatum brought something to my attention, just clouded my head, it's nothing." "What did she say?" "That Belly is in love with you... But the way she said it... I don't know, and then it made me think of what Jeremiah said. Have you ever had feelings for her?"
He was silent.
"Right... So I've been think, a lot recently since last night. Summers... almost over... and I don't know if now is the best time for us. You have so much going on with your mom and long distance isn't what you need right now especially with you starting at Brown."
"Star- I choose you. I'll always choose you. What I've felt for Belly in the past doesn't compare to the way I feel about you. Don't do this. I- I- I know I can do this." I shake away my tears. I've thought long and hard about this and it needs to happen.
"I know and I believe you, but. No, we'll both be super busy-" "I just got you back." "And I'm not going anywhere, i'll still be here whenever you need me, I just think this whole US thing should be on pause. We can't use each other to run away from our problems anymore. We have to face them Connie." I could see the hurt in his face, looking in his eyes made tears fall from mine.
"They're better to tackle when I'm with you." "...I just feel like this is something you should do alone, or with your family at least." This was goodbye once again, at the end of another summer. We weren't even good at this when we were kids. "I love you Conrad, always. It's just that we need to get our lives together a little bit so we can finally have our infinity." He nods, whipping away his own tears.
"I love you Starlight." "We'll keep in touch, I promise." I sigh standing up, Conrad doing the same. "This isn't goodbye." He nodded. "No, I'm not saying goodbye to you anymore." I nod.
Our eyes said all the words that we couldn't find it in us to say. And I couldn't help it. I kiss him. It was filled with so much emotion. Sadness, happiness, loneliness, fear, lust, and love. So much love. Pulling away from him we rested our foreheads upon each others.
"Infinity?" I laugh through tears. "Infinity." He nods.
Until we meet again.
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