The only Bowuigi fanfiction on Wattpad

Killer Queen

(Luigi) And now I was married. Legally married. To a freaking lizard who thought I was a girl! Anyway, the ring wasn't just big, it was big enough to be a necklace. Also, I didn't mean to kiss him for so long, I just, um, slipped, into kissing him for about 30 seconds.

After getting legally bound to this lizard, I stomped upstairs to my room cause my heels were killing me. I slammed the door, took off my heels, flopped on the bed, and took off my veil. It felt so good getting to be a man again. I wanted to fall asleep then and there, but there was someone knocking at the door.

"What do you want?!"

"Honey, you're missing the after party!"

"Mama Peach is trying to sleep!"

"Are you alright?"

"No! Now leave me alone!" I sat up.

"Oh my. Dear, I'm gonna come in."

"Wait, no!"

Bowser opened the door to me without my veil on. He was shocked. I was shocked. We stared at each other.

"You're that loser Luigi!"

"That's Mama Luigi to you!"

"You are a dirty, filthy, liar!"

"Listen, Daisy put me up to this, no falt of my own!"

He grabbed me in one fist and squeezed all the air out of me. "Please don't kill me!" I said with the rest of the air in my lungs.

"Oh no, I'm just gonna put you down and let us work on a sewing project together, of freaking course I'm gonna kill you!"

"Hey, what are you doing?" A smaller, Grey version of Bowser was at the door.

"Morton, go to your room."

"Yeah, what are you two doing?" A pink version with glasses was at the door now.

"I think they're gonna kiss!" Another small version of Bowser was at the door. One by one the small Bowsers piled in and argued about what he was going to do to me. I think there were 8 in total.

We looked at each other, then at all the children, then at each other again. "Listen, children, I am not going to kiss him, I am going to murder him!"

"Aw, but you'd make such a cute couple!" A pink one with a bow said. Everyone else agreed.

"Yeah, you already kissed me once, Bowser boy, how bout we go for round two?" He did not like my joke. The kids loved it, though.

He sucked his teeth. "Don't call me Bowser boy." He started clutching very hard. I couldn't breath.

"I like this guy, papa!" The smallest one that looked the most like him said.

He looked at me with guilt. "Fine, I won't kill you, yet. Now I need talk to the plumber man, go to your rooms!"

"Fine." They said. As they walked out of the room, Bowser closed the door.

"Listen, the only reason I'm keeping you alive is cause my children like you. When their affection starts to wane, you are dead."

"Wow, you're a family man, cute."

"Don't tempt me."

And so concluded my first day of being a political barging chip. Well, so I thought. I was about to go to bed when I heard a tapping at the window. I got up and opened it. It was Daisy and Birdette?

"Hey Luigi!" Daisy said.

"What's up?" Birdette said.

"What are you doing at my window and why is Birdette here?"

"Catherine helped me sneak up here. She's really cool!"

"Why though? It's the middle of the night!"

It was Birdette's turn to give the answers. "I'm an inside woman, you're a double inside man! You seduce Bowser then we ponce! I'm gonna let everyone in, of course!"

"Wait, you want me to?"

"Keep being Peach!" Daisy said.

"But he--"

"Listen, it won't be that hard to seduce him! He's a family man who just wants a wife. So be the wife." Birdette said.

"Anyway, we have to leave now, I have a couple koopas on my tail, see ya later!" And they dropped out of sight.

Oh God, the rescue team didn't know he knew that I wasn't Peach. This is gonna screw up the plan some way. The plan that I have no clue what it is cause no one told me even though I'm a crucial part of the puzzle apparently! Great, just great.