Chapter Thirty-Nine: Hamilton to Layden letters (1781)

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February 26, 1781

To Lieutenant Colonel Solomon Layden.

I thank you my dear Layden for your letter, presumably sent only a day or so after my absence. I can only hope that I am not the only one feeling completely distraught over our separation, and your written word brings me much relief. 

The days of travel have been tedious as I was still considering to be replacing Lieutenant Colonel Forrest's place, who is desirous of re tiring on half-pay, but I decided instead on resigning and going back to Betsey. I now see that I have made the best choice I could have.

Elizabeth is not with child it seems, she was having a fever that caused her terrible nausea. When I had finally arrived, she was as pale as parchment, as sickly as m̶a̶ ̶m̶é̶r̶ ̶ ̶ ̶a person could get. Thankfully she is now alright and thriving, the most beautiful woman I have laid my eyes on. My sentiments you know of remain unchanged but I still find myself lucky to have her as my wife

Though she is not pregnant today I assure you that she shall be soon. Does uncle Layden sound appealing to you? 

Send my regards to Tilghman and Marquis

Yours sincerely, affectionately and truly (is that how we wrote it?),
A Hamilton

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March 2, 1771

To Colonel Solomon Layden.

My letter has not reached you- curse the British and their constant interception. I have sent three others in my impatience. Please humor my insufferableness my dear as years and years led me to expect you at my side at all time and I feel incomplete without you with me.

You would love the Schuyler mansion in Albany. It is bright and spacious and so intricately beautiful- I cannot fathom growing up in such a place, where everything is so pristine and made of China. I admit that perhaps to me it is stifling when I know that the carpet my feet are on is worth more than my life. Betsey- bless her- does not understand my unease and I can only be happy that she never had to know such troubles.

Angelica Church and her husband are planning to move to England or France in the distant future. I find it unfortunate as she is very fair and an intelligent woman of wit. 

I found our old letters :)

Yours sincerely, affectionately, faithfully and patiently,
A Hamilton

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March 17, 1781

To Solomon Layden.

What has happened sir? I have sent over ten letters and I have not received a single reply. I appreciate that you do not favor this type of communication and that you have much work to be done but surely a note that you are well is plausible? I know that you have received at least one of my letters as I had sent it along Lafayette's letter to which he replied to.

Please Solomon, at least that. How is Tilghman? Does Tallmadge fare well? Have you heard any news from Meade?

I have been spending much of my time with Mr Schuyler. He has been telling me of his place in the army and his influence in Congress. I believe he has served two terms, which I find most impressive even if he does not. It is most strange to me that wealthy men think of their positions and professions something mediocre. Perhaps I am the fool for being surprised.

On a nicer note, I have tasted something most peculiar and delicious. Betsey calls it ice cream, and it is definitely very cold- I do not know how to describe it as other than frozen milk and sugar but that does not give the dish its rightful justice. I will admit that I had more than one portion but so was everyone else so I shan't blame myself for indulging.

Please write. I miss the vanilla perfume.

Yours sincerely, affectionately, faithfully and slightly peeved,
Alex Hamilton

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March 25, 1781

To Solomon.

Do you wish to kill me with your silence?

For God's sake, write- spare me of my worry. Do you intend to torture me? Had I done something to anger you, to annoy or peeve you then tell me! Truly the only conclusion must be that I have wronged you in some way and as much as that pains me, I understand. Be angry with me, call me names, anything but this horrid silence! You know my love for you, and nothing shall never falter or cease it, but these lack of replies truly pain me so.

We shall be finding out if Betsey is with child the day after tomorrow. She has been feeling unwell these past few days and I have spent them by her side getting whatever she requires. This constant waiting has put me at unease but I am pulling through as well as I can manage. If she is, I can only hope that Betsey shall present me with a boy. By no means do I would I be any less happy but I fear that instead of her mother's charms she will inherit her father's caprices and then enslave, tantalize and plague one half of the sex- which is the reason I protest against a daughter.

A bit of my life. The family has awaited a new child themselves recently- Catherine Van Rensselaer is her name and she is a loud pest whenever I see her. While I adore most children this one cries like a rabid animal and finds much pleasure in tugging my hair- I have a headache as I write this. Even so I am happy to see the family in joy as the last child was stillborn. I can only hope that my own child is not that much of a hazard to my sanity as little Catherine;

I expect you to keep this letter for your eyes only my dear. Though I doubt you're even reading this.

Again, I find myself begging you- write. There is not much in this world to live for except for you and Laurens.

Suffer me to present my regards and love to the Marquis and Margaret

I love you- do not dare forget that.
Your Alexander

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March the 30th 1781

Cher Hamilton,

As on this Fine day I and Vimcomte du Rochambeau talk of a potential Southern Campaign (Washington ne cède pas, mais je crains que Cornwallis ne Devienne chaque jour un peu plus une Menace) I feel I Have to jot down a letter asking what you have written in your previous letter to our Mathematician. Whatever it was I beg you Not to writ so again as Layden burst into Tears earlier today. Be gentle with your words- you must already know of what Terrible Shock the Sir is going through.  I̶ ̶c̶a̶n̶ ̶n̶o̶t̶ ̶d̶e̶s̶c̶ ̶ ̶ ̶I̶ ̶w̶o̶r̶r̶y̶ ̶ ̶ ̶ Mais do keep writing Layden your letters as I am afraid it is the only thing keeping his head above water.

Send my pity to Mrs Hamilton- my heart Cries with hers

Your friend
Lafayette

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