Loki x Yn imagines/ oneshots

I'm ready to go

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Ceylan2210

You sit there, you wrote your letters, everything is done, you finished everything left you wanted to do, you were ready to go, you are a bit scared, because of the pain but also the fear of failing this attempt, you tie the rope in your closet amd tie it tight around your neck and you step up onto the stool, knowing in one small kick it will be over. You kick down the stool and hang there, you feel your breath leaving you, your skin burning, veins bulging, the sound of your risky voice coughing is filling your ears, ears ringing you are ready. Your excited, you just want to be free. You can't wait to be dead, because you know you deserve it, you have nothing to live for. You hate everyone, everything, you hate yourself most of all. The pills do nothing. Just as you feel your eyes about to close the bar breaks, making you fall to the floor. You weren't ready to give up, or try tomorrow when you were alone, you knew you didn't have much time. This plan was riskier, living with the avengers someone could catch you, so you knew you had to be quick, you run up to the roof, you didn't have much time, you just wanted to leave, you were so angry to be alive you couldn't stand it. You wanted to be with them, the loved ones you lost, you didn't want to be here in a world that can only hurt you, it's too hard to live, there's no way out, no one cares about you, your worth nothing, it will be better once your gone, all you do is hurt people, and all they do is hurt you. You stand up on the edge and see a car race around the corner.

'YN WHAT ARE YOU DOING GET DOWN!' Loki shouts from the ground.

'I-I'm sorry I tried really hard I promise.' You call down to Loki stepping foot over the edge.

'No don't, dont.' Loki teleports to the roof catching you by your shoulders. He grips onto you tightly leaving marks on your skin his knuckles turning white as he tried to pull you over the edge.

'Let me go, I don't want to be saved, please fucking let go of me.' You shout thrashing your legs trying to push your feet against the wall to push yourself away from Loki.

'I won't.' He says pulling you over the top landing on top of him. You jump up trying to get over the edge but he pulls you down on the ground landing on top of you holding your arms down. You thrash underneath him persistent as angry tears stream down your face.

'Stop it Loki stop, stop now.' You sob.

'I'm sorry darling.' He whispers gently kissing your lips, and sitting you up holding you in a hug.

'Please don't be mad, please I Uhm, I don't want to talk about this can you just pretend you didn't see this.' You cry into his chest defeated yet angry your still here.

'I won't tell anyone, I won't make you talk about it my love but maybe at some point we just can try to talk about a little ok? I love you Im not mad, your going to be ok, it's not worth it. You don't have to stay for anyone, but try to stay for yourself, stay for the little kid in you with no doubt about life, stay for your future success, even if your staying because you have to, your staying. I'm so proud of you ok, I know it's hard but I'm here, it will take time but you know you have to get better, you can't end it like this. I'll try not to overwhelm you with everything but you can always come to me, I'm always here.' Loki whispers squeezing you tightly.

'I-I'm sorry.' You stutter feeling every possible feeling.

'You don't get to be sorry, it's not your fault, you did nothing wrong you hear me? There's nothing wrong with you, your beautiful, kind, smart, funny, you make so many people's lives better, your not a waste of space you are needed here. You need to be here, somewhere in you, you don't want to die, you just don't want to live how you are, they say it all gets better but it doesn't seem like that does it? They don't understand your life. You do, you have been through hell but your still here. I know how angry you must be, but none day you might not regret it, you still might, but if you quit now, all your pain. Don't let it all be for nothing.' Loki says as you let your weight go in his arms and just melt into him, the last few tears escaping your eyes, you don't know what to say or to think. He carries you downstairs to your shared room and lays you gently on the bed, getting in with you and holding you tightly as you fall off to sleep.

'I love you darling.' He whispers.

'I love you too Loki.' You reply knowing he isn't judging you for your attempt.

(As a survivor I am so truely sorry, I don't know you, I don't know your life, I imagine it is hell. It's terrifying knowing this is where you are. I can't tell you it's all going to be ok, I'm still trying to figure that out. I understand you must be hurting, hold on for yourself, that tiny bit of hope, do it for the little part of you that is scared to die. Do it for yourself, don't let them be the only reason keeping you here. Make a reason, let yourself be the reason. Just because you love yourself doesn't make you selfish, if you have stomach fat, a big nose, thin lip, a moustache, thick brows, greasy hair, a big forehead, pimples, overweight, underweight,
If you have made some mistakes it doesn't make you what you believe you are. There are people who want you here, you are worth it, you are perfect and the people who don't think so are so deeply insecure about themselves they will do anything to make someone else feel like shit so they can feel a tiny bit better. Reach out, your not alone, your going to be ok. Just make it another year ok. It's not worth it, that one more cut, you may feel you can stop if you want but you can't. It's not worth it. Don't let the pain be for nothing.)