Draco's Hufflepuff | Emerging

Eight: Mesmerising

**

Wednesday, 25th September, 1996

The weather today was dreadful, it was well and truly an autumnal day. The skies were grey, it was the coldest it had been in months, and there was that horrible drizzly, annoying rain.

It seemed to really reflect how I was feeling. Over the past couple of days, I had been feeling a little sad. There wasn't any particular reason, I just felt off. Hannah reassured me that it was probably my body adjusting to the Contraceptive Concoction, as she was the same for the first few weeks. I felt like an idiot for not realising, as it's literally written on the box in the list of side effects.

I told Draco this, as he was a little worried when I burst into tears out of the blue one evening. He said he wants me off of it – he'd rather just pull out than have me feeing upset. I told him I'd be okay after a little while, and after back and forth, we came to the compromise that if I was still feeling this way by the middle of October, then I'd talk to Madam Pomfrey about it.

Today in Charms, we were finishing our work on the Eradication Spell. Professor Flitwick was having us cast Deletrius on some old and chipped terracotta plant pots.

"I saw you speaking to Liam last night in the common room, does that mean you're seeing him again?" I asked Leanne,

"I'm not sure, Maddie. He's nice enough, and we got on well, but he keeps giving me mixed signals," Leanne shrugged,

"What do you mean, mixed signals?" I cocked my head slightly,

"Like we were talking in the common room the other evening, right? We were sat on the sofas, we were really close, and he put his hand on my thigh. It wasn't sexual or anything, but he just rested it there, stroking my skin with his thumb as we spoke and he even kissed me. Then the next morning, it was like I didn't exist," Leanne swallowed deeply, "Am I being a massive idiot, Maddie?"

"No, of course you're not an idiot. Maybe you just need to pull him aside and ask what his intentions are. Maybe he's waiting for you to make a move on him or something," I suggested, hoping I sounded supportive, "Have you kissed yet?"

"I can't make the first move, Merlin's beard!" Leanne exclaimed, like I had just said the most controversial thing in the world, "He's the boy, he needs to make the first move. So, no, we haven't kissed," Leanne added,

"Why does the boy have to make the first move?" I asked, genuinely curious,

"I don't know, it's just how it's done, isn't it?" Leanne remarked,

"I guess, but that's not the confident and strong Leanne I know," I said to her,

"Well, when you make a move on a boy, let me know, and I'll do the same," Leanne muttered. I could have sworn there was a shred of sarcasm to her voice,

"You're right, I'm pathetic, I know," I nodded, turning back to my plant pot,

"Shit, that came out wrong, Maddie. I didn't mean it like that. I am so sorry," Leanne said hurriedly,

"It's fine," I whispered, feeling my chest tighten.

**

The feeling I had swirling around inside my body left from Leanne's comment still hadn't vanished by the time our Defence Against the Dark Arts lesson had begun.

Sitting with Hannah, we were all finishing off our work about the Imperius Curse. The quiet was nice, calming in a sense. We were reading through the chapter in our textbooks and making notes on pieces of parchment.