Jegulus (Taylor's Version)

'tis the damn season - Regulus

Regulus' POV:

"James has been hanging with Lily a lot lately," Sirius said suddenly, breaking the comfortable silence we were sitting in.

My eyes snapped to him with a withering glare. "If I wanted to know who he was hanging with while I've been gone, I would've asked him."

"Ouch, no need to be so cold, Reg," Sirius mumbled dejectedly.

Then I heard the last possible voice I wanted to hear at that moment behind me. "What do you mean cold, Pads? Reggie makes my glasses fog up."

"I'll leave you two to talk," Sirius said as he lifted himself from the ground. "Bye, Prongs." He waved to James and scampered away. Coward.

"You okay?" James asked me quietly as he sat down where Sirius had been only seconds before.

I didn't look at him, though I could feel his piercing gaze on me. "I'm fine, Potter."

He was a bit taken aback by the tone of my voice and my use of his last name, but he continued nonetheless. "I felt it when I passed you. What's wrong?"

I knew I wasn't getting out of having this conversation, even if I left, he would've only followed me around until he forced me into it. So I spoke in a low whisper, "I can feel you, too. There's an ache in you, and it was put there by the ache in me." I figured maybe now he'd let me go. "So if it's all the same to you-"

"It's not the same to me. You know, we could call it even if you just come home with us."

"What? You'll call me 'love' for the holidays?"

He grinned that grin that made me feel like agreeing with anything he says. "'Tis the damn season," he joked with a shrug.

"I'm staying at my parents' house," I said bluntly.

He looked like his heart broke a little as I said that. "But doesn't the road not taken look real good now?"

I didn't know why I was still engaging in this pointless conversation. "Potter, that road always leads to you and your home. I left my coat between yours and Sirius'. That holiday lingers in my heart like a bad cologne."

"Reggie, you can run from this, but only so far. Sirius escaped your parents, you watched him leave. So if it's okay with you-"

"Everything you do is okay with me."

"Can we call it even? I miss when you'd call me James."

I shook my head. I could not believe I was doing this. "Yeah, well, time flies, it's as messy as your undone uniform. And you know I miss your smile."

"Just hear me out, we could just walk around. If you'd just take my hand, I'd feel real good now, and I'll lead you to a home with me. We can sleep in half the day, just like old times."

"I won't ask you to wait for me if you don't ask me to stay."

"So you'll go back to Grimmauld Place and your so-called parents, who'll make you get the dark mark if you meet all their outlandish expectations? Won't you ever wonder about me, because I'm the only soul who knows which smiles you're faking?"

"The heart I know I'm breaking is my own to leave the only home I've ever known."

He was holding back tears now as he moved to kneel in front of me. "We could call it even." I wish he'd stop saying that.

"Even though I'm leaving? I'll always be yours in my heart, but we can't just call it even. I can't call you James just for the season."

He took my hands in his and put his forehead against my own. "Please don't stay at your parents' house. A future with you and me is looking real good now."

"Time has flown, I never get to see your messy uniform undone anymore. I just miss seeing your smile, I want to hear you out. We could just run away, the road not taken looks so good now. It always leads to you. It always leads to you." My voice slowly got quieter and quieter as our lips got closer and closer.