"Lydia?" I called for my boss, "come in" she answered from behind the door. I opened the door to her office and slipped in, promptly closing it behind me. "You're on in 15" I alert her and she nods, getting up and smoothing the nonexistent wrinkles on her blazer. As she begins to move I quickly go to the door and hold it open for her. She produces a small, almost invisible smile and exits the room.
Even such a small gesture makes my heart flutter. I know it's wrong, but can you blame me for it? Even though she's a very strict person she seems extra nice to me. Smiling only when I can see her, she's a great boss. I close the door behind us and quickly walk behind her trying to catch up. My thoughts wander once again and I close my eyes, physically shaking my head to get rid of them.
My eyes snap open once I feel my body come to a halt. I see Lydia looking over her shoulder at me curiously before turning around fully. Shit. "I'm so sorry I wasn't paying attention" I blurted out. "That much was clear. Be careful next time" she said warningly but I could see a glimmer of what looked to be care in her eyes. I nodded nervously and she turned around taking deep breaths.
"Your meds?" I ask her and she nods with her eyes closed, holding out her hand. I pour one into her hand from the container and give her a water bottle from my bag. She hands back the water and takes another breath, shaking her nerves away before crossing the threshold to the stage. I watch in awe as she flawlessly conducts the orchestra. With simple strokes of her hand music comes to life.
She's always so in control, perfectly executing everything around her. Her constant composure was the first thing that intrigued me about her.
How can a person be so perfect?
-
She sighs as she sits down in her office chair and I take place on the couch waiting for instruction. Her eyes are closed, her head leant back and resting in what looks to be an uncomfortable position. "Come here" she says suddenly and I stand up and quickly make my way to her. "Yes?" I reply standing over her since her eyes are still closed. They flutter open and she stares at me, releasing butterflies to go wild in my stomach
"Hold me" she demands coldly and it catches me off guard causing me to stand there confused. Before I can think anymore she pulls me down onto her lap and my arms instinctively wrap around her. I can hear her deep breaths as she inhaled my scent, I only know because I'm doing the same thing. "How is it that I can control everything... except my feelings for you?" She asks rhetorically and I would be lying if I said I wasn't excited of what's to come.
"I see the way you look at me. I can practically hear your heart beat faster. Especially now..." she says putting her hand on my chest. "Relax, schatz" she coos softly before stroking my hair. "Tell me..." she starts and I hum since I've been silent this entire time. "What do you think of me?" She asks and I furrow my eyebrows, "what do you mean? You're amazing... at everything" I reply.
She pulls away and forces me to sit up, my legs on either side of her. I look into her eyes nervously, expectantly and she scans my face. Her hand cautiously raising to cup my cheek and caress my face. My eyes struggle to remain open, my heart threatening to beat out my chest. I look into her eyes feeling like all hopes of keeping my secrets inside is fading. "You know what I mean, y/n" she whispers, I realize now how close our faces are.
"Lydia..." I say, "tell me. Everything" she says softly. "Sharon" I state, "we're friends, no more no less. I've accepted the fact I'm no longer in love with her, it's certainly a hard pill to swallow for both of us. But, we've come to an understanding, it's nothing to worry about" she says reassuringly. I remain silent as I think about all of the things I could say.
"Kiss me" she says after a while, my core throbs at her commanding tone. I lean in and capture her lips, holding her face with both hands and attempting to show her without words how much she means to me. Over the few months I've been her protege I've developed stronger feelings for her than anyone I've ever met. I pull away for air and pant, keeping my eyes closed to let the passion linger.
I finally open them to see her staring back at me with a small grin on her face. "Be my girlfriend" I say and her face shifts into one of immense shock. "Say yes Lydia, don't worry so much" I say knowing how her anxiety gets to her even though she never admits it. "I didn't think this through" she says shaking her head and moving her arms that were once around my waist in her lap.
I reach between us and grab them in mine, squeezing them to let her know I'm here. "Some things don't have to be analyzed and calculated. Life is unpredictable. Love... doesn't make sense sometimes and that's the beauty of it. I can't deny the way I feel when I look at you, hear your voice, even just the mention of you makes my knees weak. Please hear me Lydia, and don't shut me out" I beg her.
She looks down at our intertwined hands and back to my face, fighting with herself. "I-" she starts, "I know. All the bullshit about how you're complicated and complex. Don't you think I know that? I'm literally around you all the time. It's only made me fall even harder for you. It's not feasible for someone to be so utterly put together all the time. It's ok to fall apart, because I'll help you pick up the pieces again" I say confidently.
I see tears brim her eyes and I move my hands to her cheeks, holding them tenderly. "I love you" she whispers, "how could you not?" I joke and she rolls her eyes before chuckling. "I love you too" I say, the door opens and reveals Sharon making me retreat away from Lydia. She pulls me by my hips making me stay put, I never realized just how strong she is. "Ahh" Sharon says still standing in the doorway. I can't look at either of them at the moment, too embarrassed of being caught.
"I see you finally made your move" she snickers making me look up at her. "I'm happy for you" she says and I can't detect anything but the truth in her voice. "Thank you. What's up?" Lydia says casually making me smile widely at her as she draws patterns on my hips. "I'm going to grab a later dinner, you guys want anything?" She asks looking at me as well and I shrug. "Sure, just grab whatever I'm not picky, get her pasta though. Whichever as long as it's not shrimp" she says, so she was paying attention?
Sharon smiles and nods before leaving the room once more so we can be alone. "Yes, I listen when you speak" she says smiling goofily, "even if you weren't I wouldn't be mad. I know you're always working up here" I say motioning to her head. "I'm never too busy to listen to you, sweetheart" she says placing a gentle kiss on my nose. I rest my forehead against hers and sigh contently.
"I love you"
"I love you too"
