summer bummer | michael clifford

09 . the plan

i felt like an idiot, asshole, and douchebag all the same time. i was a bitch times three towards michael. sure he's an asshole to me, but i still wanna treat him like a real person, especially after what happened in the tent.

i don't like him, in fact i still have some burning hatred for him. i could admit i needed him. i needed to experience that again. if not now, sometimes in the near future preferably. shit. i still need a swimsuit.

i remember how paisley offered that i borrow one of hers and pull her suitcase out from under her bed and start to rummage for one of her suits. my hand scales over the bottom of her bag, only to realize that it's not hers, it's ashton's. i take my hand out of his bag quite quickly, and a piece of paper flies out with it.

my stomach drops, it was the letter. my fucking sex dream letter was folded up in ashton's bag. my mind races, how did he get it? did he show everyone? that was when i remembered, ashton took down the tents. i never moved all my shit out of the tent. ashton's had my letter for over two days. that's two days too many. two days is long enough to tell everyone.

i throw the paper on his bed in a fit of rage. i was feeling so many emotions at once, the one thing i can't let happen though is to cave in. michael expects me to stay at the cabin, i'm not gonna let him win.

with tears streaming down my face i let out a huff, start to find paisleys bag and rummage for a swim suit. it was a navy blue one piece, i don't even bother walking to the bathroom to change. i throw my clothes on my bunk, the sheets in a ball next to them.

i don't have enough energy to confront ash at all. i feel horrible for assuming paisley told him, and want to apologize despite have never accusing her of it. guilt just works like that, sometimes it eats at your thoughts, not your actions.

i throw on some sunglasses to hide my puffy eyes, i walk out of the cabin shutting the door slowly behind myself being extra cautious not to slam it. i turn around only to come face to face with ashton. this is exactly what i didn't want to happen.

"paisley was worried so she sent me back for you." he muttered pursing his lips, his eyes trained on my face for a second before darting to the dirt. i took a step back, trying to form a sentence before ashton butted in, "look if you found the letter it's not what it looks like. it was just a little souvenir. thought it'd be funny to have paisley tease you about or some shit." he chuckled lightly, yet his answer still made me uneasy.

i barley know ashton. sure he's paisleys boyfriend but it's not like we're best friends, so this whole interaction felt awkward. "ashton just stop, it's fine. i don't care right now, just don't tell anyone." i let out at sigh when i said the last part. he nodded lightly and waited for me to start walking. the whole walk to the lake was dreadful. not one word was shared between me and ashton. as if the unbearable awkwardness between me and michael wasn't enough, i now have it towards ashton as well.

i sat on a beach towel while i took my shift monitoring the campers with luke. the rest of everyone- including calum- was farther down the shore playing in the water. i fiddled around with the red plastic whistle dangling from my neck.

"is everything alright with you? you seem... off." his voice was laced with concern, which pushed me to actually be truthful, kinda. out of all these boys i've been introduced to in these last days, somehow i feel the best about luke.

"shitty week i guess." i sighed while glancing over slightly at luke, his face showing a confused look. "perk up. you need to do something fun, get your mind off everything." he nudged my shoulder a bit before leaning in to whisper, "as much as i hate to admit it, michael was right, we should all go skinny dipping." i whipped around to make eye contact with luke, an amused look displayed on his stupid face.

"and you should bring those joints too." he tried to contain it but burst into laughter while my jaw dropped. shit, i knew him and michael searched my bag but i didn't know they really searched it.

"you gotta be fucking joking." i laughed along with luke, one of the first times i genuinely got a good laugh at this camp.

he composed himself enough to say, "i'm being serious. we can even leave michael behind, i got the perfect fucking plan." he said with a smug grin. "spill it then." i chuckled while turning so i was sitting towards him.

"you'll even bring the joints?" he cocked an eyebrow at me before i nodded with a smile still left on my face. "ok so, he's a really fucking heavy sleeper at night. we can all rally up at like 1am-ish, and sneak out. we just gotta make sure we lock it so michael really can't follow us. he can fend for himself in the cabin. give him some water and food, he'll be just fine." i laughed at the last part, realizing maybe luke hates michael just as much as i do.