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: *. .* :☆゚8. Change of heart?

❝Did you mean what you said this morning?❞

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Did you mean what you said this morning?

─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───

"Right, you got what you wanted Oikawa, see ya" I spoke as I closed the door, ready to walk home. Oikawa's eyes widened as if he had forgotten I was only putting on a show of being nice for my dad's sake.
"Wait!" He called after me, waving his hands in front of him as he walked over. "Let me drive you back to your apartment," he said, moving one of his hands to rub the back of his neck.
"You sure?" I asked, plainly.
"Of course I am," he smiled a little, walking around me to go to his car parked across the street.

The car ride was silent, I keep my eyes on the window just like I had the last time, my mouth shut tight as usual. I wasn't paying to much attention to what was going on outside the window, I was so busy caught up inside my own head that I hadn't realised the car had came to a complete halt until Oikawa spoke up.
"We're here," he said.
"Oh, uh — thank you," I said to him, turning my head to finally look at him, kinda caught off guard. His expression looked almost sad, it was hard to read, which is unusual for Oikawa because I could usually read his expression with no problem. Was it because of me?

My hand lingered on the door handle.
"Oikawa?" I asked, averting my eyes so I wouldn't have to look at his face. God this is stupid, why do I feel so guilty? "Did you mean what you said this morning?"

My hand that wasn't on the door handle, gripped onto the fabric of the sweater I was wearing. That's right, he gave me this too, to put over my dress. Why is he so nice to me? It feels wrong.

"Of course I did," he said, his voice was close to a whisper. I nodded, slowly.
"You had girlfriends while we were friends, while you loved me," I made air quotations while I said 'loved' and my breaths felt kinda shaky while I was talking. I wasn't sure why I was angry but something about the whole love talk still left a bad taste in my mouth. "You told them you loved them I'm sure."
"[y/n], I was in the middle of my teenage years,
I didn't really know what love was when I was with them — "
"How do you know that you know what love is know. What if it's just the same, like it was when you were with them?" I interrupted, finally looking at his face once again, it still looked sad. That kinda made my heart hurt a little. "How do you know you aren't still confused?"
"How are you so sure that I am confused?" He replied, sharply and his voice raised.

"Because I know you feel guilty." The grip round the hoodie tightened more.
"So what?" He said, voice still loud and a little angry, maybe stressed. I'm not too sure.
"So, maybe you're trying to heal your guilty conscience the only way you know how," I said, my voice got a little shaky at the end, it was embarrassing. "You think I was in love with you back then, so you're convincing yourself you love back to make up for it."
"That's so stupid, [y/n]. Your spouting complete bullshit right now," he snapped back. His face was a lot closer to mine, like he was trying to get me to make eye contact again.
"Well, it's my opinion," I retorted, crossing my arms and slumping into the seat.

The car went quiet for a while. Both us breathing heavily. Even if I didn't believe he loved me, this did feel like a fight with a boyfriend. I sighed hard and tried to speak up again.
"Look, I don't think it's possible to be in love with someone you could easily stop talking to for a year and even if you were, I don't think it's possible to still be in love with them when you reconcile because you don't know someone as well as you did a year ago, people change too much all the time," I explained as calm as I could. "And you going on about all this love shit makes me sick to my stomach, so please just stop."

When I looked up to face Oikawa's face again, I watched him swallow hard with big, wide eyes on me. His mouth twitched a little before speaking.
"I don't really agree with you on that but I'll stop, if it'll make you forgive me."
"Thank you," I replied, breathily, thanking him because I wasn't really sure what else to say. "But I really don't know how to forgive you."
"I'll do anything," I muttered, audible enough for me to hear. His words made my body feel tense.

"I'll drop off your clothes tomorrow okay? I'll wash them for you," I ignored his words and left the car before he could say anything else.

─── ・ 。゚☆: *.☽ .* :☆゚. ───

Changed this chapter bc I didn't like the old one and I want oikawa to word a bit harder for [y/n]'s forgiveness 😈😈😈
It's been a while tho hello, I just finished my first year of uni !!!!

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