The Boy Next Door

19 - No one ever understands. Not even me. Not even a little bit.

The next morning, I woke up feeling like absolute shit.
Not physically...I think.

I couldn't explain it, I just would not let myself get out of bed. I just lay there, starring up the ceiling feeling tears run down the sides of my face, but no related emotion within me.

It made me uncomfortable that I felt nothing but cried, I wondered if that was normal.

Jenna left for work early, and I just didn't end up going to school. It wasn't even a consious decision, I just..didn't go.

About an hour an a half later, I managed to sit up in my bed, and put on some Netflix.

I got a text on the grouochat at like 1pm,

Noah: @Kiara wya

April: Mrs.Smith asked for you, I said you were sick. you good?

Me: hii yeah all good, overslept :/

Bella: you're coming to the basketball game, 7pm

Me: I'll try, I'm kinda tired.

Noah: I'm playing, you have to be there 🙄

Me: haha alright I'll lyk :)

Noah then private texted me asking if I was alright, and I said I was, which I thought I was true.

I threw my phone away and looked back up at the roof above my head, not able to fully comprehend a single thought in my head.

I got up and looked in the mirror, hating what I saw in front of me.

I felt tears painfully streaming down the sides of my face again as I walked towards my closet, picked out a huge hoodie and sweatpants. I washed my face, braided my hair, and was back on my bed, scrolling through my phone.

The whole day seemed to run by the same way.

I barely ate, I wondered around my house a little.

I woke up at like 7 in the evening after a disgustingly long nap, feeling groggy, disoriented and still half asleep.

Out of fucking no where a tiny bit of dopamine finally entered my brain, giving me the urge to shower and freshen up.

It's about damn time.

I sniffled and got out of bed, picking out a pair of cotton shorts and a black tank top.

My shower went on for like an hour, after which I felt my skin start to absorb the water, and headed out, my finger tips wrinkled.

I dried my hair and put it in two braids so it would curl up, and hopped back into my bed, hugging my knees due to the cold.

I took a deep breath not knowing what to do, involuntarily, I found myself opening up an assignment. It seemed relatively easy, so started. I got distracted here and there, but overall felt slightly better.

A call from Jenna at 9, reminded me to eat dinner, so I headed over to the kitchen and tried to cook myself something. When that failed, I ended up with a salad and some cereal, which was alright.

At about 11, I was gonna make myself some hot chocolate when the door bell rang.

That was unexpected, Jenna wouldn't ring the bell, and no one else would be here this late. I then remembered my conversation with Dylan last night. What if I really was an easy target, there's no way someone is here to attack me right.

I narrowed my eyes brows, and walked to the door, a little scared for no apparent reason.

I pulled the door open, and unexpectedly saw Noah standing there, a sloppy grin over his face.