Starcrossed: A Star Wars Fanfiction

Don't Call Me Mi'lady

"Put this on, mi'lady. We're leaving."

The droid seemed to think she had no other choice as he urgently handed her a traveling outfit weaved with the finest blaster-proof karlini silk.

And Lex knew she was getting a fight when she came to her sleeping hub to find the droid rampaging around, tossing her crew outfits aside and dumping travel outfits, potions, elixirs, and all her secret belongings into an emergency cargo bag.

"No. We're not."

Lex hung the outfit back where it belonged in her wardrobe.

"Yes, we are."

Q2 took it right back out.

"We can do this all night, mi'lady," he warned her. "I'm a droid. I never sleep."

He was programmed to behave this way.

It wasn't his fault.

It was hers. Her and her talent for recklessness.

Because as much as she'd like to go away somewhere quietly, just like they'd told her to, that just wasn't her style.

And the less innocent bystanders she dragged into this with her, the better.

So, knowing what a comet-fire of chaos her life actually was, she insisted on leaving her homeworld alone.

But that was overruled, of course.

Better a moody Zekan cyborg holding her hand like a nanny all over the galaxy than nothing at all, they had said.

____________

"I am Q2-400," he'd introduced himself to her. "I have been reprogrammed to serve you. Assassination mode is currently deactivated. Human life defender mode is active."

"Well, that's irony for you."

"Please explain your meaning, mi'lady. My data drive for human emotional intelligence has been rebooted," he told her. "It is secondary to my annihilation drive, which is currently on stand-by for your protection. However, I am easily adapted to acquire new information on human sarcasm. Would you like to continue?"

"So, not only did they send me a droid I didn't ask for, but an outdated one," she sighed. "First off, droid. Don't call me mi'lady. You will refer to me as Lex Halo outside of Jeotis. Got it? And second, stay out of my way."

"I am sorry, Lex Halo, but my orders were to never let you out of my scanning range."

"Let's get something straight between us, droid. I didn't ask for a body guard and I won't need one," she informed the Q2 series bot. "Not where I'm going. And if the occasion calls for it, I got a DL-44 blaster hidden in my work hub, and two smaller pistols I carry on me at all times. I also keep my own homemade thermal detonators, a stun pike, a pair of wrist rockets, and if all else fails, I can tear someone's eye out with a decent punch."

"Impressive, Lex Halo," Q2 approved. "But how are your navigation skills?"

"I know my way around a starship, and I can program my own computers," she challenged the droid to top that. "I also have a knack for reading star-system maps, and can locate any star in the galaxy--Blindfolded."

"And your language skills? How will you communicate with the natives on their respective home planets?"

"I know eight of the languages commonly spoken within the Republic and the Outer Rim, including Galactic Basic, Huttese, Mando'a, and Ubese. I've also picked up some droidspeak while on the run," she told him. "So, like I said before, I'm a one-woman squad. Your services are not needed."