Glass Houses

Chapter fourteen

TW for reference to child abuse

It was the day before Visiting Day, and his nightmares had reminded him. He woke with his Mother's face still on his mind as he pressed the palms of his hands into his eyes, breathing deeply. He had no reason to be nervous, he told himself. She wasn't coming.

None of them were.

It was still early, so the bathroom was empty when he opened the door, bright artificial light momentarily blinding him. The grubby tiles were cold on his feet as he turned the hot water knob, the water freezing at first.

It was eerie, Sirius thought, being up this early. It was quiet enough that if he closed his eyes, he could pretend he was in another bathroom, in a cleaner shower with soap that smelt like lemongrass and left his skin itching. He could pretend that his brother was knocking on the door, yelling out that he was taking too long, he could imagine his Mother banging on the door until he turned the taps off.

Sirius turned the taps off.

He tied a towel around his waist and went to walk out, glancing at the mirror and stopping mid- step. He hadn't looked at himself in the mirror, really looked at himself, since he arrived at Dauntless. There was muscle where there hadn't been before, his skin was coloured by bruises of all colours. Some a deep purple, some fading to a sickly yellow. He almost didn't recognise himself, it was a bit disconcerting.

The scars hadn't changed though. They never did.

The first time, his Mother had thrown a candle at him, the wax burning his neck and dripping down to his chest. He had screamed. He had been nine.

The second time, his father had dug his half finished cigarette into his back, burning through his shirt. Sirius had knocked over his glass. It had been a week before his tenth birthday.

His eyes flickered up to the thin red line on his cheek, and he squeezed his eyes shut, thinking back to yesterday, the knifes, his conversation with Moony.

"So they look just like-"

"Look just like what?"

He was an idiot. An idiot that needed to apologise, he thought as he walked out of the bathroom, towel still secured to his waist.

"Shit, take a look at this!"

Sirius halted. The room had been cleared apart from Zacharias, Evan, and Snape. Fuck his luck.

All three of them were looking at his bare skin, which he knew was littered with red and white scars, puckering his skin deeply in some places. Sirius flushed red and made for his bed where clean clothes waited for him.

"Fucking disgusting," he heard Evan spit from behind him.

Sirius walked faster, anger rising up like a wave.

"You fall in a fire or something?" Snape asked, his voice close.

Sirius spun around, and the three of them were right there, looking at him like he was an animal in a cage.

"Or maybe the rumours are true," Snape continued, smirking.

Sirius glared at him, "What are you talking about?"

Snape laughed, "Everyone knows there's something weird about your family. I wouldn't be surprised if these were from your lunatic parents." He reached out and dug a finger into a scar near Sirius' collarbones.

Sirius smacked his hand away in irritation, trying to push down the panic that Snape had caused. Did people know? Was it obvious?

"Why so quiet?" Zacharias sniggered.