02| Call me by my name

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As I collapsed onto the bench, panting and sweating, I felt a sense of serenity wash over me

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As I collapsed onto the bench, panting and sweating, I felt a sense of serenity wash over me. The ache in my muscles, the burn in my chest, they all faded away as I basked in the satisfaction of a grueling two-hour gym session.

I closed my eyes, allowing my heart to absorb the moment, and took a deep breath, filling my lungs with oxygen. The gentle breeze coming in through the window acted as a soothing balm for my soul, easing the strain from the intense workout.

The morning was still, the only sound the soft chirping of birds in the distance. The sky was ablaze with hues of pink and orange, painting the world in a warm, inviting light. The air was fresh, carrying with it the sweet fragrance of blooming flowers.

I strode from the gym, my footsteps echoing on the hardwood floor. The clock on the wall told me it was 6 am, and I remembered with a start that I had risen at 4, as was my habit as a devout morning person.

I love these moments, when the world was still and the only sounds were the soft whispers of the early morning. 

I walked around the room, trying to soak in all the familiar details. Everything felt unfamiliar. My childhood bedroom. A space filled with memories and laughter for most people, but for me, there were no such pictures. There never had been.

Maybe this sense of unfamiliarity rooted from the changes I've undergone. I've changed, and for the better. I wasn't the same person who walked out of this room years ago. Back then, I was filled with fear, loneliness, vulnerability, and a desperate hunger for love. 

But the present me? I'm different now. I'm unbothered, guarded, detached.

Tossing aside all the chaos swirling in my head, I strolled into the bathroom. Twisting the door knob, I let the water flow, washing over my tense muscles. As I lathered my hair with shampoo, the scent of eucalyptus, cedar, and a subtle hint of leather mingled in the air, filling the space with an intoxicating aroma. Squirting some shower gel into my palm, I slathered on it, giving myself a thorough scrub-down before washing it all away.

After wrapping myself in a bathrobe, I faced the mirror and went through my skincare routine. Yeah, call me obsessed, but I take my skincare pretty seriously. I mean, why should it be just for one gender, right? I want my skin to be healthy and fresh. Once I was done pampering my face, I headed to the closet and threw on a comfy pair of khakis and a polo shirt. Casual but put-together, just how I like it.

Giving myself one last once-over in the mirror, I headed downstairs. 

The sight of the grand dining table greeted me, empty of any human presence. Once again, it was just me, myself, and I. It's been like this for almost two weeks now, and I can hardly remember the last time I had a meal with someone else. 

With a resigned sigh, I plopped down into my usual seat. Same old routine, different day.

The maid breezed into the hall, her arms loaded with delicious-smelling dishes. She wasted no time in setting the table with a mouthwatering array of food. I wasted no time either, helping myself to a plate of perfectly seasoned eggs and a side of hearty whole grain toast. 

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