Our Circumstances

Chapter 10

"Saliha, what's wrong?" Maria's soft steps made way to the bed, where Saliha sobbed in fetal position. 

"I don't feel good", came Saliha's response. It's the truth, she told herself, but from an emotional stance.

Maria licked her lips. "You don't like him?"

Saliha said nothing.

"My dear, it's okay if you don't like him. There will be others -"

"Will there be, though?" Saliha snapped. "There were five who rejected me -"

"-And there was one who accepted you", Maria finished, displeased with her daughter's behavior. "Saliha, you are acting silly - as if Anas is the only man out there for you. Don't feel so defeated when things don't work your way. Have faith in Allah."

Saliha crossed her arms in an offended manner. "It's easier said than done. It takes time, and I feel so hopeless right now to think any better." More tears escaped her eyes. 

Maria lowered her voice. "My dear, you are a very young, beautiful woman, Masha'Allah. There will be others who will like you both outwardly and inwardly." When her daughter remained silent and grumpy, Maria sighed. "Your desire to get married right away is remarkable, young lady, but you need to check your intentions. Are you only marrying for love, or are you marrying for the sake of Allah?"

With that, she left her daughter alone, surrounded by the depressing environment encapsulating her with her own melancholic thoughts. I am marrying for the sake of Allah... As her mother suggested, she checked herself. But if that's the case, why am I so... upset? 

Saliha dried her eyes. ...If I truly did something for Allah, I wouldn't be. I wouldn't be despondent by the outcome of the action. 

She was about to leave her bed as soon as she heard her phone ring. Peering over her screen, she saw that it was Najam calling her. 

She's in for a tea-worthy story.

---

"It'll be all right", Najam assured her friend. "Your mom's right about other people out there."

"I guess..." Saliha began taking off her jewelry. "It's just... frustrating."

"I feel you. Things like this take time. It took my cousin about ten years of rejecting men before she found the right one for her."

Saliha swallowed. "T-ten years?"

"Oops, I didn't mean to be a debbie downer. I'm not saying it'll take you that long. I'm just implying that you recently graduated, and you shouldn't be looking at a month's progress and calling it quits."

When Saliha stayed silent, Najam followed up with, "So... what's wrong with him, if you don't mind me asking?"

"He's..." Saliha searched for something to say after, but her mind was a jumbled mess, repeating the occurrence that had just taken place over and over. 

"Is he not attractive?"

"S-Sure, yeah. That simplifies everything."

"I get it. Sometimes, they're just not your cup of tea."

"You have experience?" Surprised that she was not informed, though it had been a long time since she contacted her friend, Saliha never expected Najam to start finding suitors after graduating - much like herself. Nevertheless, she was grateful for a direct answer from her friend, and that she didn't urge her to extract more details out of her; it was nice to keep a conversation like this short and simple.