nineteen

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a very long month had passed since that day and the young blonde hadn't thrown up since. he had moved back in with his lover about two weeks after and things were going smoothly. kind of.

the two were laying in bed together. ashton's arms were wrapped around luke's body which was facing away from him, mindlessly exploring. "luke, you're beautiful," the man said to break the silence. "i know it's hard for you to accept that your body is changing but it's normal and you need this."

the blonde shut off his phone and set it down beside him. "don't be silly, i'm completely fine with it," he replied as he bit his lip. ashton rested his chin on the other's shoulder and exhaled slowly, looking down at his body.

"i know better than that." the elder's hands grazed his boyfriend's soft stomach which caused him to suck in slightly. "luke."

chills ran through luke's body. "i'm scared," he admitted.

ashton motioned for the other to turn his body to face his and set his hands on the blonde's waist. "of what?"

luke sighed before rolling back onto his side, facing away from his lover again. "mm..ffa.." he mumbled before turning the bedside lamp off.

"oh, luke," the older man tugged the other's body close again, "you're worrying me."

the blonde flipped over once again to face his partner, "don't send me back. you cannot leave me with my mum again." even in the dark, ashton could see the fear in luke's eyes which seemed to spread across his whole face as time passed. the subtle urgency in the man's voice made the other man worry even more.

"baby, you're not okay," he stated, running a hand through the blonde curls that lay messily around luke's neck, strands falling out as he combed through more and more. "you can't keep doing this," he added.

"you cant either."

"luke, i'm not," ash said firmly, "you're gonna fuck your body up."

"the only thing fucking up my body are the extra pounds i keep gaining, i look fucking weird."

"maybe you wouldn't look so weird if you let your body keep those 'extra pounds' long enough so they would actually evenly distribute themselves across your body!" regret covered his face as he shook his head, "i-i didn't mean that, i'm sorry."

it was too late. the blonde's body filled with rage and embarrassment as he slapped his lover across the face. "what am i even doing here?" the man scoffed as he rose up from the bed and put a big t-shirt on.

"luke, no," ashton whined, scrambling to stop the man he loved from leaving.

"it's people like you who keep me from recovering fully," luke shouted as he turned away from the man with golden curls and went toward the door. a hand reached out after him, roughly grabbing his cold hand and pulling him back. soon both of ashton's hands were spinning the blonde around before they forcefully pulled his face close to his own, topping the act off with a harsh kiss.

luke's heart fluttered for a second before he came back down to earth where his problems lay right in front of him—literally kissing him. the blonde pushed the other's chest as hard as he could, sending The Problem to the floor in seconds. "get away from me!" he shrieked before he ran out of the bedroom, "and leave me alone."

meanwhile, ashton sat right where his boyfriend had left him. his big hands covered his face while hot tears began streaming down his cheeks. his mood swiftly changed, though, as his solemn expression turned to an angry one.

their relationship had been a lot for the older man to deal with as of late. he felt that they were both getting too old for this, their relationship hadn't grown a bit since it started. luke would never listen and ashton had relapsed more than he had before they even started dating.

he never wanted to hurt the blonde but he couldn't deny the fact that his eyes had started to wander, desperately searching for something healthier—someone healthier. maybe this was finally his chance.

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⏰ Last updated: Aug 09, 2023 ⏰

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